P.E.R.F.E.C.T.I.O.N

2009-11-09T17:52:00.000-08:00

Its been a while since i blogged. Not tat i was buzi at work, juz didnt really have the mood to type things out even though there are lots to tok abt. Aniwae the weekend wen by even b4 i realised it. Its soo frustrating when u wait the whole week juz for the weekend and when it finally comes, its back to monday again. OMG. seriously i need more weekends. Haiz.. Aniwae spend sat by celebrating vasa's 24th.. shes a yr older now and i wish her all the best in life. That makes me think abt life once again. When i turn 24, which is juz in a yr's time, will i still be deciding my life or wud i have already known where i wanan be?? hmm... really hope i wud have decided. Cuz this period now has really been killing me from all the thinkings of wat i wan in life and wat is it that i sud do and sooo on.. guess age is in fact really catching up and if we don grow up in our minds, no1 can help us.

This weekend awaits another bdae party.. binteee!!! Excited.. m actually going clubbing for her to a TAMIL club after wat feels like million years.. hahaha.. n guess with whom?? VINNOD..tats even more surprising.. club+vinnod+indian club.. hahahaha.. soo funny but yeaah.. finally gonna club together!! hahaha.. hope it goes well and i don have to bump into seeing fights all ard, tats one of the reasons i hate entering these places. Ppl cant seem to juz enjoy thmselves and leave, they have to do smth.. errr.. irritating. but watever it is, im hoping for a really good time outtt.. with more bdae cakes and surprises for binte darlzz.. ;) Following wwek wud be vnods bdae and guess wat.. im cluelesss.. i havent planned anithing and m sooo lossst.. really hope i get it all settled real soon. :)

Its just tue todaeee.. OMG.. i woke up thinking its sat.. can u believe it. SAT!! when is JUZ TUESDAY.. i should kill myself for this man. errrrr.. tats hw much im hating my routine and mandane life these daess.. its like lifeless and i still havent done anithing abt it. No matter how hard i try. Was thanking moi lucky stars jzu this morning as i havent been bumping into the VP for some time.. but guess wat, i had to this morning. Said "Hi mrs Y" to her and guess wat i got as a reply.. "what u mean hi Mrs Y, its Good morning Mrs Y".. OMG.. like wat the hell rite?? i mean wats a prob.. im soo not her student, but i get treated like some shit here. N best of all.. it seems ydae was some staff retreat for the whole school, INCLUDING the ADMIN staff and guess wat.. I wasnt invited, neither was the IT educator. We were the only two souls whu werent invited. Smth is really wrg sumwhere in tis school issit it. Really.. sucks. M seriously considering transfer of school. Might even be dropping a msg to my Manager later todae for a transfer possiblilty. Hope it works out. Btw applied for a job too, really hoping to get it though.

Aniwaeeee... im juz counting down the hrs to leave work, meeting llb todayyy.. excited. always makes me happy to meet him. donno y. even after like wat... 6 yrsss.. hahaha.. weird. but hope we have a gr8 time later at my fav placeee!! hmmmm.. maybe i can bring him to dine at botak jones.. he's been wanting it n now suddenly im craving for it.. haha..:) Gotta go collect the books i reserved too.. seriously i enjoy being brought to the world in my books i read, juss sumhow makes me feel better and smile.

Oh yessss.. m soo looking forward to watching paranomal act movie with kesu boy n mummy nishal this weeek, and marina barrage outing tooo.. our looong planned not executed outing. cant wait. i hope it really makes me feel more peaceful and brings all my tensions away. Cant waitttt.... might be meeting pray this week tooo.. mite be going out with collegues too.. hmm.. now suddenly these soo many meetings and no days.. lol.. always like tat. lets see how it goes.. hahaha..

Charlotte juz came in from her break from eng dept meeting and passed me some VCDs to watch.. soo sweet of her rite.. but i wud still prefer her being here instead to gossip and biatch.. haha missed biatching with her man.. maybeeee i shall ask her out tmr.. we shall go dating.. lol... now not only my biatch but my date.. k k im bored to dead and going crazyyyy!!!! errrrr..... Gonna do sum online shopping nowwwww.....

cheeers. :0

2009-11-03T21:22:00.000-08:00

Wednesday, but wat feels like friday. Haiz. Just came back from lunch. Basically am rotting for half a day already. Ydae had sum work to do, so it wasnt so bad. Today none.. hmm.. sooo killing time as usual online. And i am seriously running out of sites to visit. Fb is irritating the hell out of me. I got nutting else to surf other then that and its such a bore.. OMG.. help me.

Finally gotta get my fringe done up today, its been irritating me. actually my whole hair has been irritating me. errrr.. i am sooo temptered to go do smth abt it. But im also motivated to let my natural hai grow. help meeee.. tell me wat to dooo!!!!! i need livooon... tekkaaa.. when am i coming to ya! oh my.... weekend is filled with bday parties and my hair is gonna be soo out of place. lol.. gonna get threading down too.. since i end at 5pm and binte ends at 5.30, most prob m going home first, changing into jeans and leaving for yishun. really m soo excited to get my fringe down. at least wen i see my face everi mrn, i don get soooo irritated cuz of that ugly fringe i have nowwwww... lol....

Aniwaeeeee.. earlier when into a meeting to pass hod smth and as usual, vp had had had to look at me from top to bottom and u knoe wat, i have thissss strg feeling shes gonna say smth later after the meeting to mee.. lets wait n seee!! irritants man.

Btw, i still waiting for my online dress to comeee.. haizz.. and im sooo in love with a new hp.. but its like 400+ in the market with a LINEE!! realli don think its worth spending soo much on a hp.. soo kinda waiting for the price to drop first. haizzz.... but im sooooo in love with it!!! seriously hope i can manage a line wen i get one real sooon!! haizzzz.... cant wait to meeet binte later.. hair hair hair... here i comeeee!!!

Oohhhhh... btw went sembawang with llb ydae and simply loveeed it!!!!!! finally got the books i need and spend quality timeee.. and the moon was awesome last nite. Felt soo peaceful. These are the moments i really yern for. i likeeee... k k guys keep ya updated on the VP andstuff alriteee.. :0

cheers. :)

2009-11-02T00:38:00.000-08:00

Monday bluee.. had it in the morning. Now no no no.. cuz its going home timee.. juz in another 10mins. yeah! hope its not raining outside. Aniwae november is finally heree... theres soo many birthdays and partiesss... OMG... excited but m so gonna be broke at the same time. Especially now when im gonna quit my job. god help me. but nevertheless, am realli looking forward to all those parties ahead. and most imptly oli's arrival at the end of the mnth.. hoooray. like finally!!! :)

Aniwaeeee.. grandmas admitted again. when to visit her last fri, was really sad. doc said she had a heart attack. I knoe shes getting old and theres quite alot of complications in her body, but seriously am praying hard for her recovery. It felt so sad seeing her lie in that hospital bed. haiz. praying hard for her to come back home and give me that smile she always give me when i enter the house.

Heard a really upsetting news last nite, one of my frens dad past away. He was really healthy and lively. Juz collapsed and died on the way to the hospital. Its really heartbreaking to hear such a thing especially when the person was all healthy and fine. Sometimes i guess this is wat we call fate and life. The unexpected always happens and the people ard it are forced to live with it. Im sure its terrible for the family now, but i pray hard that they get better. Seeing such things juz makes me wonder y i still complain about life.

cheers guys.

2009-10-29T20:13:00.000-07:00

Its 11.15am now. Finally i've got sum time for myself now. Whew!! From the time i entered the staff room at 8am till now was piled up with lotsa work to get done. suddenly. teachers and hod passing me last min stuff to key in and complete. Thank god i finally have gottan it all down. hope i can relax for the rest of the day. 2pm taking over a badminton class for a teacher, so tat was be niceeee and freee!!! as long as im not in the office im happy. hahaha..

Btw.. ydae when out with SNGS collleguesss... not the whole bunch of us.. but emmy, wai yin charlotte and myself. When for early dinner at AMK hub Fish and Co. Ordered sum stingray fish and it was OKAY onlyyyy!! hahaha.. kinda enjoy sitting near huge window seats for dining lately. hahaaa.. as usual we were toking crap and checkin out this cute guy at fish n co. actually it was juz chalotte n mee.. the other two are innocent. but really, he was cute. hahaha.. afterwhich, headed over to amk central to buy KOI.. im started to crave for that drink lately. really nice, ordered chocolate milk tea which was way nicer then normal bubble tea store and extremly swweeett... OMG.. the ice cream tea wai yin bought was tat bad either.. nice niceee!!!!

Then came the best parrtttt... emmy left for home and charlotte wai yin n i made our way to the poool centreeee.. started playing pool. actualli was juz my fav biatch n me playing, we even taught wai yin how to play. can u believe it?? WE TAUGHT SUM1.. when we ourselves cannot make it!! seriously both our standard of pool are the exact sameee.. really.. maybe tats one of the reasons i really enjoyed and soo much fun playing ydae. we have a couple of roundds and it was seriously fun and i was enjoying myself after such a loooong timeeee!!! As usual, being ard mua biatch just make us go crazy and break the rules of the gameee... realli. charlotte embarressing urself once again in front of meee.. *go stand in the middle* im sure u got it biatch!! hahahaha.. n hitting the black ball in and we juz taking it out as if nutting happened and continuing the gameee!!! lol.... funny man!! it was a gr8 timee out and im sure there are more to comeeeeee.....

For nowww.. excited for tonitee.. halloween at nite safariii..... gonna be a really packed weekend for mee.. not gonna get much time to spend with lbb alonee.. tats sad... haizzzz... aniwe wish ya guys all a gr8 weekend!!

cheers:)

2009-10-28T22:24:00.000-07:00

My VPN account is LOCKED. Great just wat i needed. But aniwaes thank god i still have got the windows acct to be able to surf the net. even though its slower then using the VPN aacount. But its okie. Now surfing the net seems sooo boring too. Seriously practically got no work today and i have been using the net the whole day. Pretty boring actually. But relaxed so happy in a way. But happiness didnt last for long. Went down for lunch and my whole mood was gone. Mins b4 eating i had to bump into VP and as usual, she cant juzz smile and leave, she had had had to say smth. commented on my dressing this time.. OMG.. saying its better i don wear leggings to skool, i mean.. HELLO.. half of UR teachers in school are wearing that. y don u go tell them that? i guess she juz needed to stop and say smth. Continued by asking me if i have learnt the doing of Gbiz from sec school ccpe. i said yes but was tot for only 5 mins. tat was it. 5 mins? she was taken aback. i mean whu wudnt be? but that was all the time the other ccpe cud spare me, so i told vp im still not sure. n then again came that tone of hers, no matter wat u have to learn it cuz there are alot more cuming and u gotta get it done. OMG. wat do u mean by that. then go ahead and tell that ccpe she has got a damn responsibilty of teaching me. i cant belive the system here in fact is really screwed. the ppl too. god help them man.

Seriously wud it kill to juz stop by toking with a smile and making sum1 feel welcome? i guess not rite? then y are ppl still like tat? i juz don understand. Whatever it is, i m so not staying here for long, tat is for sure.

Btw fought with lbb last nite, was pretty upset.. especially when things were going soo well and nice. suddenly it had to happen. and for no reason. tats the best part. when to slp not feeling good at all. morning wasnt tat good either btw us but now i guess its alrite. toked, felt better and not its pretty much back to normal. hope soo.

Aniwae met up with darlings ydae.. nishal and kesu boi. was really a relaxing day. smth i badly needed and got it. Ate BK after wat felt like mnths, then bought dozen donuts of all flavours and went up to the rooftop of vivo to chill,tok, snap pics, relax and jzu gaze at the stars. was realli a nice time out with them. smthimes such outings are really needed to destress one. Im glad i found these darlings to make my day and make me smile. :) thanks guysss.. u knoe i love u lots.

3 more hrs to ciao.. counting down.

cheers. :)

2009-10-27T21:25:00.000-07:00

Wat frustrating and getting on my nerves again.

WORK!

Wat else..

Ever since i got myself hooked up in this job, seriously i havent gottan any peace of mind. Again i had an incident of being pushed ard yday. HOD asked me to get sum gbiz thingy done but i have nv looked at such a thing b4 and was nv tot, so told her and she got the AM to help out and me sit in to learn the procedure. While sitting in, AM saw the date to get the ITQ submitted and panicked big time, saying its sooo late, she cant do it and all sorts of things. Then logging off from her name and telling me to log on using my name, but thank god i havent had an acct yet from MOE, so had to wait up for that. While waiting, i had to get my buttto dairy farm for the p5 camp and here i was getting calls from the AM on to check if i have rec it from MOE.. i mean wat the HELL.. u knew i was in CAMP rite?? then?? OMG... HOD was getting pretty stressed over not getting the whole issue done up and stuff. But really, wat can i do?? nutting!!!! Sorry guysss..

Came back to work today to have my VP telling me things werent pleasant ydae, i mean cumon, i KNOE TAT! But whus fault is it?? Tell me? Well told her i wasnt tot and cant do it without assistance and there she was telling me to get the sec skool CCPE to help me out. toked to AM and got sarcastic remarks as well. Good start of the day rite?? woaaaa.. soo kept quiet as usual and called up the other CCPE to knoe that shes buzi and wud call meback wen shes freee... soo hack it. get it done or not done, i simply don care.

Seriously i feel that these pppl are only matureed in terms of appearance but lack soo many other things. Especially having been working for years now, the professionalism issnt there, frankly, cannot make it. Firstly, its best to learn how to respect each other, regardless off the levels in btw. I really don like the idea of being ard being whu simply don knoe wat the word RESPECT really means. and they call themselves Teachers?? OMG.. sum1 plzzz help them.

really this stuff happening ard here has really been frustrating me soo much. Its juz tiring the hell out of me and i don deserve to be treated in such a manner. Really. I have to stop this soon and the only way is tooo..... tell ya soon!!! wish me luck for the rest of the day man. i need it badly (asloongasimstuckhere).

cheers.:)

2009-10-25T21:51:00.000-07:00

Monday blue.

Tats exactly wat i have been feeling from morning. But hey, the day got better, surprisingly. hah. In juz 10 mins, my contract teachers n my fav biatch is gona leave for home leaving me all alone here at this dumb place. got no1 to biatch n complain too. cant be disturbing wai yin (the IT educator), a cute gal whu looks way younger then her age. Well she has got alot of work and i cant cgo ard disturbing her... i have completed my work and i guess i wud be rotting for the rest of the day, in a way its good and in a way its bad.. haiz. i still prefer going hm now instead of sitting here in this weird political environment. haiz.

Met up with vinnod and shanky last evening for sister's keeper movie and cried all the way towards to end of the movie, it was seriously damn touchy and sad. Wasnt exactly the movie i needed for a sun nite but i kinda started thinking alot of life and its importance after that. especially after toking soo much to shanky and hearing abt life and problems in all 3 of our lifes, feel that smth really needs to be done. After reaching the age of 23, i've realised that there are soo many things to think abt now, worry abt. Life. suddenly the word seems soo huge. Really need to find out waat i wan in life, need to settle down. Dont wanna waste my life being in smth that dosent satisfy nor make me happy. haiz.. alot of thinking to be done.

Aniwaeee.. surprisingly my HOD was really nice to me today, came ova to ask me for help and toked in a realy cheerful way that kinda made my stay here a lil better. so thank god for tat. But tot abt it, even though its gonna be all nice n gr8 here, i really don think this is wat i wan? i feel i sud explore myself and find out wat is it that interests me and what i enjoy and do smth with regards to that. Soo am soo gonna start nowww... Aniwae sat, for the stress management seminar, suddenly im the emcee now.. OMg..sucks, really not into such a thing but guess i have to contribute my part by helping out. Pretty nervous, really hope it all goes well.

Really cant wait for the week to past, wed getting my pay, cant waitt!!!!! m going broke already. seriously i hate mondaysss.. it feeels soooo long to the end of the week.. i mean i knoe it is. this is wat i hate to feel, this feeling.. and its occuring cuz im not doing smth i like to do, i practically forced to do it, and i don feel life sud be this way. Its ur life and i feel tat we sud do smth to make it the way we want it to be. i knoe sum things arent in our hands, but im sure we can do smth to make it close to making us happy each day. At least, waking up eeveriday and happily lookign forward to the day. I mean, how many of us are doing that these days? i don think there are many. im soo gonna do smth abt tat serisouly.

Aniwaeeee... theres another 1 hr 40 mins for me to leave this placeee.. haizz.. tmr theres P5 camp at diary farm road. hope its gonna be a fun one. Wud be there the whole time tmr. No office. In a way its pretty good, especially having my biatch there with me. haha.. but still im waiting for the weeekenddssssssss.......

cheers guyss..:0

2009-10-22T21:59:00.001-07:00

Guess wat!!! Its a FRIDAY!!!!!!! Like finally!! YEAH.. and to make it better, im leaving work 2hrs earlier.. haha.. m claiming my time off for tueday and wednesday. YEAH.. it feels gr8 going hm early on a FRIDAY. only if all fridays were like this. haiz. But watever it is, im so gonna enjoy this moment for now. Oh yes, i kinda ended up replying to one of my in charge, the HOD thru SMS last nite in a very firm and stern manner. I hope they get the hint that i arent sm1 they can push ard. i guess with my sisters support im juz gonna end up fighting with everi1. haha.. but i think they really deserve it. i mean cumon, msging me last nite at 7pm and telling me u need a work down by today? whu are u kidding man? firstly it wasnt office hrs, so i sudnt be entertaining ur msgs, secondly, u heard from the VP that i am claiming my time off, yet u expect me to finish to work by today. go to hell serisously. So i msged back sternly saying that if i cant, too bad, i have to continue on monday and guess wat.. the reply was k, thanks. so i won. horrray. thanks to my sis. ;)

Bt guess wat, i kinda finished all those work assigned to me already. took me juz 2 hrs to complete it all, tot it wud take much longer but got it done and have been rotting at my desk from 10am. hahahahaaaa... mite mite mite be joining my darling collegues for KFC lunch later.. hoorray.. but i jz ate.. nvm. eat again. m becuming like charlotte. hahaha.. shes soo gonna kill me if she reads this. sorry babee.. the fact. mmuack.

Aniwae, m excited to meet up with llb toniteee.. gonna stay out till late and tooook, laugh and juz relax ourselves. its been a looong whileee.. kinda miss those moments. hehehe.. btw got him a lil gift for 24th tmr, actually it wasnt planned for 24th, saw it and juz got it. hope he likes it. and i got another visiting to go this at, tmr.. excited. more palagaram and fooood. im sooo being a piggg.. hehehehehe... hope i have a super loooong weekendddd.... have a gr8 weekend guysss..

cheers. :)

2009-10-22T01:36:00.000-07:00

Finally i get to blog.. after sum time. there are like so many tings going on and i am practically going crazy. seriously things were so bad last fri for me, at work. got shouted at from my HOD for no god damn reason. OMG. she just needed sum1 to vent her anger on and i ended up as the scapegoat. horrible and hated it. called llb and started tearing. OMG. i mean if i got scolded for a mistake i wud accept it, but cumon, it was cuz of nutting and cuz that woman was nuts. errr..

but eventually got cheered up wen i met up with the gals in the evening at tekka for suit shopping and deepavalli countdown. Llb came too.. had lotsa fun, especially when the fireworks were up, and we blew the poppers open, it was soo much of fun and extremly super TIRING. we were dying. Then deepavalli day, ther weekend was spend visiting, ate like a pig at the houses and had a great time. sumhow realli love deepavalli sooo much. all the sweets and food. juz like xmas. soo much of fun. i love. :)

Aniwae tuesday and wednesday was spend bringing the kids out to another pri skoo for sum gifter programme test, while they were doing thier tests, myself and the contract teacher, my fav Mr ang left for J8. We practically when rotting ard the shopping centre, eating and toking all kinds of crap. so it was a good half day for me on both the days. But eventually had to come back to work to complete my work. Today whole day sat down to complete the attendance keying in. OMG. sucked. but tmr is gonna be a super relaxed dayfor meeee... nutting much to do in the morning and at 2pm atleaving school. m claiming the extra hrs i put in this week for work.yeah. its friday and i get to leave early. its like hooorayyy...

seriously hopee the weekend runs soooo sloow then i nv have to come back to work next weeek.. haizzz...

cheers guys. have a gr8 weekend.

2009-10-13T18:08:00.000-07:00

I so gonna say this out loud.. " I HATE WORKING LIFE ".

OMG. It juz sucks. okay, i know i kinda enjoyed being free for almost a month ever since i started work at this place, but recently there are jus too many things to do. Sometimes i juz cant help but feel that they are throwing everithing on my head. and that can be soo pissing off. ydae was a really stressed out day, seriously i knoe its nutting, the taks turned out to be easy, but i still cudnt help but feel the pressure and stress there. and it was soo sucky. and today, here i am sitting here continuing the same thing i was doing y'day, but guess wat?? im sooo gonna take it damn slow and do it in my own pace w/o tensing and stressing myself up. I mean cumon man, i can afford giving up my happy times cuz of a stupid job like tat.

Btw, forget abt work, this week is seriously a super tiring week for me. Have plans all the days of the week after work and its tiring me out sooo much. But meeting up with m darlz also makes me happy and makes my day. But it just make me sooo tirred. Haiz.. on monday when for a production at substation with nishal and kes, yday met up with llb, went to wdlds and got moi fav skirt!! oMg.. finally.. im in love with it! now i juz cant wait for the dress and top to be delivered to be. thoes i got online!! hahaha.. ;) and todayyyy.. m meeting up with my darlinggggg PRAY!!!! After wat feels like yrs since i last saw her man.. OMG.. miss her like crazy!! its gonna be sooo much of fun and lots lots of laughter for sureee.. cant wait. but again, im sooo tireed. haizzz...

Tmr going out with colleguesss.. yippie!! but b4 that am gonna hate the day, i gotta go skool in the morning then leave ard noon to go to a sembawang skool for traning and then back to amk for meeting up!! im pretty excited for the evening part, but not the morning n afternoon.. haizzz...!!!

k guys, i better get back to work.. oh yesss.. guess wat, i juz applied for ibanking.. like finally!! now shopping online is gonan be soooo easy man!! yeahhh!!!

cheers. ;)

2009-10-11T17:41:00.000-07:00

Weekends gone.. now its back to work. sleeeeepy.... omg... didnt slp well last nite due to the extra humid weather these days.. haizz... kept waking up.. tossing and turning. god... and now im like hell sooo slpy.. errr... its juz 8.45am in the morning. i guess i got a loooong day to gooo man!! but my motivation.. later at nite!! meeting up with nishal and kes for the production at substation. cant wait. At least i have the drive to move on today.

Well weekend was good, i mean when issnt it rite! :) Friday after work, met up with my fav biatch charlotte for KFC and it was a hell lot of fun.. laughed till i bacame sooo full.. toked soo much of crap and seriously had a hell lot of fun. in the midst of toking n toking came charlotte's joke of the day.. or the year.. OMG.. turning the chicken ard.. OMG.. it was hilarious man. we laughed till we teared. haha.. wud nv forget that incident my whole life i swear. after which we headed over to her home to take her sweater as we were going for a movieee... n saw her uncle and ah kong.. sooooo cuteee... i mean he was one of those cute grandpa's ard, welcuming me in.. niceee!! then headed over to amk hub again for the movie, tat pig made me walk allll the way to her home.. OMG.. my KFC also got digested.. made me run for the bus when we were cuming back when i was in agony.. *hints* lol..

Rushed for the 7.05pm movie, which we were late for by 5 mins or sooo and got iN!!! Sorority Row.. not bad, i gotta say my biatch has a good tast on movies.. it was really nice.. trilling and exciting! we were practically shouting and toking sooo loudly most of the time in the theatre man. It was sooo fun. Really enjoyed the day to the max.

Then sat, stayed home the afteroon playing with kayla baby... she came over!! As usual, made my day.. sooo adorable and soo sweet!! She says the word "ok" so damn well these days. simply adorable. Then headed over to NP for the JG show with vinnod, prem, mishna, senthil and sum other frens. Show was really good. Interested and entertaining. M soo proud of the producer hari. Think he did a really great job. :) then headed over to mac with vinnod, prem and mishna and had dinner there and started tokin n toking n toking till we didnt know the time went... left the place ard 11 plus and headed to take bus back hoommeee.. wanted to watch midnite movie, but i was dead tired already.. haha.. sooo got down at amk after a loong bus ride home and vinnod walked me hooome.. for the 2nd time in life.. he rarely does tat.. but it was nice.. meant alot to me!! haha..:)

Sunday.. stayed home the whole dayyyyy.... rested... slpt like a pig.. watched movies on TV.. and juz relaxed!!! ;)

This weeeek is gonnna be soooo buzy.. GOD HELP MEE!!!!!

cheers.:) have a gr8 weekend guys.

2009-10-07T01:31:00.000-07:00

Again im blogging just half an hr before i leave work.. haha.. today has been a really tiring day at work man!! finally got my token (access) to use the accts and soo there goes my free times and slacking. i mean, i still get to slack but not 8 hrs already.. haha.. not its back to work already. But its good, im learning more each day and gaining more experiences. haha.. today covered duties for a hockey teacher for 2 whole hrs.. was juz sitting down at the grand stand waiting for them to finish. OMG.. it was sooo hot and boring man. But seeing the kids play hockey and the others in their various CCAs juz makes me miss my pri and sec skool life sooo much. Really, cant believe i use to complain during that time.. when those were the best times in ones life. I wud give anythng juz to get back there. Here now, it a whole new diff thing, we are growing up, being more matured, gotta think abt the future and stuff, soo many things.. haiz.. that is life. But seriously i really miss those days.

Other then that, had lotsa keying in to finish up too.. and even now i got sum extra easy work to get down, but guess wat.. im not working.. im juz gonna relax till i knock off and do it all up tmr. afterall its a brand new day tmr.. lol...

oh ya.. llb left for genting today morning.. haizz.. sadly.. hw i wish the 3 days run fast!!! k k guys im gotta leave soon..

cheers.

Unreasonable school system

2009-10-05T01:09:00.000-07:00

Its juz another hour more and i wud be heading home.. yippie!! But donno y.. the time seemed to have ran super fast today, being it a monday and me practically doing nutting at work. Seriously the whole day today, not even one work done cuz theres no work. I came in office, chatted with my colleagues and started using the net, toked on the phone with nishal darlz, oliver and others and practically rottin at work. OMG.. but it was fast, maybe cuz i was playing games on fb, reading beautiful touching love stories online. Nearly made me tear, sooo sweet. oh yes, watched p.s: i love ya, again ydae on star movies and like te first time i watched it, i cried again. that is one movie that always make me tear no matter how many times i watch it. sad.. but seriosuly a beautiful movie. im sooooo in love with gerard butler, he's juz soooooooo WOWW!!! k k lets not get there...

hey.. actually i did one work today.. haha.. i reliefed a pri 1 class for their com lab lesson and OMG.. half my life was taken due to that. Kids these days are realli lil devils trust me, i mean as much as they are adorable, they can really make me sooooo tense up man! i was practically screaming at the top of my voice for them to keep quiet and listen to me, but NO.. no1 bothered. i think its juz my face, soo this shows it.. Madeline can NEVE be a teacher. Goodness. But i muz say it was a good experience. At least now i know that i cant make it as a teacher. But really they were sooo adorable, and its soo funny to see these adorabe lil wans juz making ya crazy, actually thinking abt the whole scenario now jzu makes me smile.. haha..:)

N yup.. was kinda pissed with the procedure the school as on its teachers earlier. my collegue whus a contract teacher went over to speak to the VP to get aprroval for a overseas leave which she is taking on NOV(which is an holiday mnth for teachers) and guess wat??? they rejected it saying sum crap that contract teachers arent allowed to take leave unless terribly urgent matters. wat crap is that rite?? i mean i don think this is fair, come on man, everi1 else has a life out there. so here my collegue was pretty upset. i really don think the school system makes any sense. it was juz a 3 days leave and this is wat she gets. dosent makes sense man. i told her to juz take an MC. i mean this is really soo unreasonable. morever they can tell her that if she does take it, it wud definatley affect her appraisal. OMG... this is really something like threatening la. I really don think this is the appropriate way to get this done. really upsetting. even my sis whus a teacher encounters such probs, but really i think teachers out there sud be like my sis and fight for thier rights, if not the schools wud juz take advantage of ya. Watever it is, really hope my collegue gets to carry on with her overseas plan.

aniwaeeee.... gonna head home soon, cant wait to leave the office and get moi hands on my golden lies book. its getting soo interesting and im sooo tempered to take it out the whole day, but m suppose to be working, don wanna get caught reading a book during office hrs.. haha.. sooo up.. waiting for the hr.... k guys catch up with ya soon.

cheers. ;)

2009-10-04T06:38:00.000-07:00

you never listened and never regretted it....

2009-10-01T18:43:00.000-07:00

Its friday guy!! Hooorayyy... Time to have fun, relax and enjoy!! yippe yippe!! Tat was moi motivation for coming to work today.. cant wait for 4.30pm.. to knock off, go home freshen up and head out with llb!! Not sure of the plans for tonite butt aniwhere wud dooo.... but im still wanting to have moi picnic plan at west coast fulfilled.. hmm.. lets see when that actually happens. and another added to my list, i soooo wanna go swimming, its been a while since i had a good swim with sum1 whu knoes how to... haha.. But basically i got no plans for this weekend, actually i told my self not to plan anything cuz i really don wanna stress my weekends up too, whens thats the only time i get to have some proper rest!! haha..

Ydae i gotta see kayla darlingg.. :) after a super boring day at work, wen over to grandma's and i saw her, shes such a lovely pie who makes my day... always nv failing to bring a smile man!! sooo adorableee.. n now that shes toking soooo much, i mean tryin tooo and laughing for evt, god knoes y.. shes soooooooooooo adorable. didnt wanna let go of her at all!!!

Omg.. just when i am typing this blog, i had one teacher coming up to me suddenly and asking me, "madeline, do u eat mooncake" and i was like "yes i do" and she was like "can i give ya this, (passing me a lil box with a mooncake) and told me "its soo nicee to having nice ppl like ya ard to help us out, thanks so much for your help" Ohhhhhh my. she juz touched my heart!! tat was really soo sweet of her.... btw shes ms regina lee from the eng dept in this skool, her eng is soo well spoken, kinda enjoy hearing her speak. But watever it is, im soo glad there are some nice ppl ard here who makes me feel more then welcome. Oh yess.. and the mooncake was from shangri-la hotel, sooo i cant wait to try it out later!! yeahh!! was juz thinking of buying one later today, hada craving for it... n here i have one for myselff!! sooo sweet. i am seriously very touched. :)

Okay, as usual, im bored to dead here with nutting to do, fb has bcome sooo boring and i got no idea on wat other websites to surf, if you guys have any suggestion plzzzzzzzzzzz let me knoeeee.. cuz im practicially dying here out of boredom. Aniwaeeeeee..... next week wed llb is going off for a vacation to genting... i also wannnn!!! haizzzz... but nvm, perhaps next time, but im sooo happy he's finall taking a vacation after a looong time and really hope he has lotsa fun, even though he's gonne be missed terribly... hope the days past fast!!!

Okay guys, not sure if i wud blog again later, if i don, have a gr8 weekend ppl!!! muacckss.. cheers:)

Shopping for formal pants + Closing ceremony of Birthday!!

2009-09-30T17:36:00.000-07:00

Sorry guys, there were no updates y'day!! Ok, where did i stop? Oh.. SIM interview on tuesday! It was perfectly well but i doubt i would get admission for the jan intake, they asked me a qns?? "do u mind the july intake if theres overwhelming response for the jan" and as wat we normal humans wud do during an interview, i politely said "no, not a prob, i wouldnt mind"!! hahaha.. but i really hope to get back to studying fast, especially when al moi frens are getting in the jan intake and moi darling nishal is already studying there waiting for meeee.. haizz.. lets hope for the best though!! sooo yupp.. after interivew on tue, met up with kesu boy.. lol.. in town, really badly needed to go shopping for a formal pants for work and guess wat.. after going up n down, i finally found the perfect pants!! im soooo in love with it.... hehehehe.. cost me 4o buckss after discount at far east!! hahaha.. oh yes, before sshopping we heading to a small tawianese food outlet and it soo felt like i was in taiwwan.. food was ok ok but their speicality, the ice milk tea was happening, im soo gonna buy that again when i go there!! N after shopping, we headed down to the mac at shaw towers to have my fav double chocolate frappe from mac cafe and kes had his himalayan tea!!!! After more n more chatting, we left and i thank you kes sooo much for agreeing to follow meeeeeee...... had a nice time with yaaa!!!!! After parting, i headed over to wdlds, to meet up with llb.. haha... after his camp, i had to borrow the books i reserved in the lib and finally i got them, cant wait to get moi hands on it!! but b4 that, gotta finish up moi golden lies by barbara freethy.. im sooo in love with her books, juz makes me drift off to another world reading them and i sooo enjoy it!!!!! oh yess.. ssooo after getting my books, we went to gelare.. hello??? it was a TUESDAY!!! How can som1 not go gelare.. hehehehe.. half price for thier wafflesss... i had my fav choco waffle with macademia nuts icecream and caramel choclate fudge ice cream... WOAAAAA..... it was indeed heaven trustmee!!! love love.. ;) N then just headed back homeeee..

Now, wats the updats for wed??? hmmmm... camee for work as per nomal, did practically nutting.. oh.. childrens day concert, helped out with taking pics for the concert (jus a reason to go watch the show) and it was soo cute and adorable, am so touched by the effort the teacher put in to come up with an excellent show for the children. you sud have seen the faces of the kids, they were sooo happy and woaa.... really.. it juz makes everi1s day.. and i cant believe when the teachers were dancing for the "nobdy but you" song, the whole crowd of kids were singing it along.. nv new these kids even new that songg.. it was sooo adorable trust mee.... Then when to meet up with VP to get some notes of moi job scope and got some work to be down and left office, reached home in 20 mins, forgot moi hp charger, left it at the office, am sooohating my HP these days, its dying on me soooo often.. errr....

so yeah, got home, started getting ready for a big niteee.. hehehe.. kes and nishal's part of celebrating my bday.. i knoe it pretty late, but these guys arent alwaysfreee and im sooo touched they still took the effort to make the day happen even though it way pasted it.... met up with nishal at bugis and kes missing in action?? and i knew it.. hahaha.. he was sumwhere preparing my surpriseeee. .hehehehe.. was laughing the whole time with nishal n as usual toking sooo much.. hehehe.. and she brought me to the place, a turkish restaurant i had always wantedt o ty out..... n there it was.. kesu boy waiting with the cake lit up and surpriseee.. woaaaaaa... moi fav part.... hehehehehehe.... singing of songs feeding the cake n laughing all the way.. (kes tot i was high) i was juz soooo happy alriteee!! hehehehehehe... n then the ordering of foood.. trust mee.. i m sooo in love with the dishes there.. the foood was awesomeee... seriosuly.. loved it man!! n moi belgium chocolate birthdy cakeee.. woaaaaa.. moi fav!!!!!

after our food arrived, i told the waiter to help us take a pic, and this is the funy part, he came to meee.. and told me.. " okie after i take a pic, u muz eat okie, because this is meat, and it muz be eaten hot, so you muz eat okie".. i was like... oooooooooooh okaaay... hehehehe.. lol.... nice guy though!!! soo i gues turkish food are meant to be eaten HOT!!! rem that k guyss.. :) and after eating i got moi gift.. hehehehehe.. a beautiful purple huge gorgeous bracelet... it was simply gorgeous, really and iwas wearing purple.. sooo it matched soo well!! im in love with it, and moi lil piggy blue flower.. hehehehe... :) soo thats when i tot the surprises were overr.. but trust me.. NOT YET!!!!

Suddenly i seee vnod walking in the restaurant, kes and nishal were like laughing at my expression, i was like "WAT!!! Wat are u doing here" stunned for a min man..... OMG.. they called him overrrrrrrr for my surprisee and then justbefore i could even digest that.. i seee moi dearest fren samad walking it, it was juz a matter of secs man.. OMG... another surpriseeeee... i seriously was speechlessss.. hehehehehe... but i loved that moment, juz made me the happiest man!!!

Im soooooooo glad i have fren who really love me as much as i love them all..... it really touches me to see them putting soo much of effort to show me how much i mean to them, seriously guys, thankssooooooo much... for taking the effort and doing all these juz to make me smile and happy. U knoe i would always love ya guys forever!!! You guys really made me sooooo happy and im soooo glad i have ya guys close to me alwaysss.. love ya alwayssssssss!!!!!!

P.S: also to my darling gals, vase, dina, neela and dipu for all the surprises and gifts and love you guys gave me for my speical day.. thanks soooo much darlingssss.. i love yaaa!!!!!!! oh yesss.. thanks to vinnod toooooooooooooooooo.......... hehehehehe... :)

K k this is a super looooooooong blog, sooo hope u have not fallen aslp yet....lol... :) catch up with ya sooon...

cheers;)

20 moremins

2009-09-28T01:36:00.001-07:00

20 more mins and im outta this place.. yeah!! haha.. didnt have much work at office today.. m trying to log back inside to continue wat i was doing but i need the HOD's user name and password.. haiz.. soo the work gotta wait till wed!! cuz tmr im not coming to work... yeahhhh!! happy happy... nt gonna miss it at all.. but gonna miss the guys, especially moi biatch charlotte.. lol..... you better be reading this biatch!! see i sooo sweet.. lol.. n jolly well miss me lots okiee!! no gossipping for one dayyyyyyy... haizzz...

Yup.. tmr.. interview with SIM.. OMG... binte said it went pretty well today.. hope it goes well for me tmrr... but serisously im really considering to take the course as full time instead of part time, especially after hearing all the stress talks from nishal and reenah darlz.. lets c how the interview goes first. still got time to decide i guess.. aniwae i gotta go shoppingggg.... moi bday mnth is ending and im sooo gonna miss out on the discountss.. OMG... moi pay had better be in by today.. *hoping* err...... i have seriously bcum a shoppoholic, trust me. Can u believe i wen to the hospital to visit moi granny and there was clothe shop there, and i was aloneeee.. soooo cudnt resist it... bought a top which was on 70% discount.. it was sooo worth it.. now got a new top and a new beautiful lonnng tube dresssss which im in love with.. got it d other day... m juz wiating for the occasion to wear them bothh... haha...

i sooooo gotta stop shopping

But excuse me for today.. or juz moi bday mnth.. let me get those stuffs i like and i shall TRY to stop.. hahaha...

K k gonna leave soon.. c ya guys when im back at work on wed.. don wan that day to comeee.. errrr..... hack it.. m gonna enjoy for noww.. ;)

cheers :0

Hot Days

2009-09-27T19:19:00.000-07:00

Its back to yet another week of work, thank god tmr im on leave.. that was one main strength giver to start my day todae. Realli dread coming to work each day, seriously still havent adapted to this lifestyle and am not sure when i would ever. Plus didnt have much of slp last nitee... all thanks to the damn weather and tots of returning to work todae.. OMG.. sucks big time.

Cant believe the weather is back to how it was mnths b4.. soo bloody hot and irritating. Never lettting ani1 slp in peace at nite, especially when u one whu wakes up at slightest tings.. i was on the verge of screaming in the middle of the nite man. Driving me nuts, and the tots of waking up early and going for work, oh my.. that was even more sucky. soooo dread it man. U know wat? Im juz gonna take things slow and one at a time, gonna tell myself to relax as much as i can and see wat can be done. Worst comes to worst, this is moi life, and im definaltey gonna make it the way i wanna see myself in. haizzz...

Aniwae weekend was fun and relaxing.. whew.. juz the exact way i wanted it.. haha.. when out of fri nite to sembawang, relaxed at coffee bean and raseberry cheesecake and double pure chocolate frappe and walk down the road with llb (after wat feels like a loong time), when to the nearby playground, played in the swing after a loooong time, climbed up some obstacle course tingy which freeked me outtt... but as usual, had llb love to help me outt... hehehehehe.. Was sooo funny... and cuteee...he hiding in the dark hole and worrying meee, especially when there were bangalas ard that area.. OMG... then playingggg.. felt like old times, young, relaxed and at peace.. and yup... not missing out on the toking session, hrs of toking. Donno y we nv ever once got topics to run out off.. theres always smth to tok abtttt.. espeicalli meee!! hehehehe... yup.. spend time till pretty late and took the last train back... felt sooo relieved.

Then came sat, woke up super late.. wow.. stayed hm still late evening after working the all time old timer hindi movie and left for woodlands to meet llb to collect mmoi reserved story books, but guess wat... had to pay fine and the dumb lib didnt except cash.. we both didnt bring any cards along tooo.. how dumb ritee... the singapore libraries sud realli do smth to make it user friendly for thier users man!! soo didnt manage to get moi books.. sadly.. soo headed of to cityhall, toooo chijimes to watch liverpool match for HIM.. err.. and guess watt!! they were juz playing the F1 race at everi pub and place, oooohh.. there was a small screen playing a match.. but it was man u vs stoke.. n he hates man u.. soooo wat a pity for him.. but i enjoyed watching f1.. lol.. with senthil and one of his fren (forgot his name, sorry) lol.... Then once again, had a looooong walk with llb loveeee which i simply loveeeed.. u kneo sometimes looong walks really helps sum1 in relaxing and enjoying.. knowing the real life and feeling the peacefulness is juz woaaaaaaa... loveeeed it sooo much.. *hints* (which means i wan more of such) lol..... Then sun spend the whole day at the hospital with granny, realli sooo sad she izznt back yet, hope she recovers fast and see her home walking ard disturbing everi1.... *prays* and back home to uploading pics till i went to bed.. OMG.. n i still got soooo many more pics to upload.. god help meeeeeee......

now: bored to dead at work, waiting for 5pm tp knockoff and go outtttttttt!!!!!!!! ;)

NewLife

2009-09-24T21:31:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, back in action once again. I think this only happens when i end up in an typical 8-5 office job. Still rem when i first started blogging during moi attachement at mediacorp. A 9-6 job, and now im starting it back again as im once again back to that lifestyle. Don even knoe y i chose to be back when im plainly hating it terribly. haiz. seriously speaking, 8-5 office desk bound job juz cannot fit me no matter how hard i try. Its jus sooo boring and frustrating sitting down in ur desk looking at the computer the whole day. OMG... sucks big time.

Okie, i havent even told ya guys where im working. In a pri school as an CCPE. Position sounds pretty good, i see lil tiny kids everiday and that only makes moi day, other then tat trust me, i really hate sitting on this desk looking at the com for the rest of the day. Time seriously seems to run super slow.. haizz.. HELP MEE!!!!

But then again, who knoes how long im gonna last in this job, lets see how. lol.. ok ok i knoe this is working life and i gotta be ready for it, but the problem is.. I AM NOT!! Im still in the mood to enjoy and have fun. I juz started working here a week ago, this is the end of moi two weeks here, but im stil finding it hard to get used to it.. haiz..

Btw lets not worry abt tat, its a friday!!! weekends here!! Finally.. i have all the time in the world for moiself now.. been sooo packed up for the past mnth, almost all moi weeekends burnt and had no time for moiself. But i wudnt say it wasnt fun, had moi bday celebration, hens nite party, going out with gals, weddings, visitings, birthdays, soo many!!! N finally i have a weekend of nutting.. juz for moi self.. i badly need this man. firstly to catch up on moi slp, secondly to spend sum quality time with sum1!! hahahaha.... N finish reading moi boook. Ive reserved two books from the lib which i've yet to collect and 1 more book waiting to be read at hommeee.. i sooo need tooo read them alll.. but wheres the time?????? trust meee.... i need moi timeeeee.. n yippeee... i finally have it!! yeah!!

This weekend is gonna be uploading pics weekend.. i have got tons of pics to be uploaded and frenz bugging me for itt.. soooo sorry darlingssss.. it wud definately be up my monday alriteeee!!!!! Aniwaeee cant wait for 4.30pm todayyy.... tats when im outta tis placee.. gonna meet erm erm for sum peace of mind.... mini picnic plan.. *excited* cant wait!!! juzz need sum peace and a goood laugh!!!!

Oh yea guys...... toking abt laugh, if u realli needa good laugh,go check out kumar's show at his cafe at 3 monkeys.. OMG.. happening. Made moi laugh till i cudnt take it anymore.. realli a mind reliever. soo do check it out alrite...

till i see ya next time sooon.... tc.. ;)

cheers.

Months later

2009-08-11T20:40:00.000-07:00

OMG.. its been months since i even visited this site man.. ;)

Stopped blogging i guesssssss....... and i still donno if im gonna return back to it.. lets see how!!

:)

2009-03-30T05:40:00.000-07:00

Annoyanceeee......... Wat else but facebook... have been trying to upload pics taken at swarnam.. n pics i owe lots of ppl.. n the stupid site is juz pissing me off.... errrrrrr...

Oh yes.. blogging after quite some time...

Wat else can i do while waiting for those beautiful pics to be uploaded in that useless website... ;) No matter how pissed i can get.. nv m i going to let moi pics be brought down in any way.. haha... btw.. m extremly excited for moi trip tiz wed.. finally the day had arrived.. crusing with moi darlings.. its jzu gonna be filled with sooo much of fun.. can visualise it all already.. *jumps* as ususal.. gonna snap pics till i can nv stop... can u believe.. m bringing moi camera charger too.. hehehehe... well.. cant be helped... juz me to keep snapping!! *smiles*

Seriously im juz taking this trip as a treat for moiself... its been a while since i travelled.. n really.. after going thru soo much of pressure...stress and etc.. both from skool and personal life... i realli need this.. haha.. n yupp... m sooo hoping to take this break and enjoy to the fullest and come back as a whole new person with a whole new feeling... n yess... forgetting sum1 especially... i mean, whats the point of thinking of sum1 whu kept hurting ya rite??? Seriously don find it worth it animore.. n kinda find it stupid that some of us sit in one corner thinking n missing sum1 wherelse the other party goes out n enjoy life without any emotion. I mean... if a person can resort to be soo heartless.. y give a damn here rite.. sooo yup... like finallly... n tot abt it.... i believe that people who deserves the best sud be with the best... sooo yup...... its better this way..:)

for now.. i simply believe in forgetting the one who hurts you and remembering the one who loves you.....

n once again.... the best deserves the best...

cheers ;)

POP dayyy...

2009-03-11T05:54:00.000-07:00

Simply one of the happiest days i sud say.

Started off early meeting up with a family i eventually had too for POP at tekong and seriously.. the nervousness was driving me nuts.. i think this can be one of the scariest moments of a womens life.. hehehe.. but guess wat.. it wend perfect.. pretty much enjoyed moiself actually.. feel realli nice and part of the family!! hehehehe.. now m sooo excited for the future.. i think.. hehehe.. i can make it!!! soooooo glad man..

N there in the evening .. gotta knoe moi results.. n YESSSS.. passed it!!! sooooooo glad glad glad... first time getting a Z in moi life tooo.. proud of the gal within moiself!! realli simply love the day... it was incredible... loved loved loved.. i don think theres ani1 out there happier then i am at this moment... contented... what else can a women ask for???? got it all.... :) juz feel like screaming and jumping ard... hehehehehe... :)

yeahhhhhhh.....

Curly Wurly

2009-03-02T05:01:00.000-08:00

Hmm... shall i say a new start to moi life today?? Or juz a new look?? hmm... ok ok a mix of both i guess.. finally got moi hair done today.. i mean.. i knoe moi previous hairdo did look normal in the eyes of many.. but... only i know how ugly the insides were.. hmm... got moi hair curled up... soo its like all curls dropping all over moi face now.. hehehe.. its gonna be harder to manage.. but juz got it done aniwae.. no regrets.. hmm.. juz thinking of getting it dyed now.. but lets c how it goess.. hehehehe... n yup.. when jogging today too.. near moi hm.. was pretty new to moi.. haha.. cuz i rarely do it.. but ended up though.. n felt good abt it!! soo yup.. tatz wat i meant by.. is it juz a new start of new look? hehehehehe...

Enjoy being newie....

After some timee

2009-02-27T06:30:00.000-08:00

Bloggin after some time noww.... Not tat i have nutting to brag or pour out.. but was held up with exams.. yup.. moi final exams in TP.. had juz two papers this sem.. Legal aspects and Managerial Accting... n from moi judgement.. i think i can make it thru.. but lets juz pray for the best!! Always.. god helps.. especially mummy mary!!! :)

Sooo yup.. finally over with exams and now practically rotting with nutting much to do.. got lotsa things cuming up.. bdae parties.. moi cruise trip with moi darlz which i m super excited for and soo many more partying days.. but guess wat... im soooo afraid of thinking of JOBS! looking at the newspapers these days juz freak the hell out of mee.. hundreds queuing for jobs each days at fairs and bla bla bla.. OMG.. juz the wrong time for graduation.. but realli planning to further moi studies yet.. gotta save up for that man.. mum says degree is on moi own expense.. n where m i going for the cash?? errr.. soo its time tooo save.. but how the hell am i too save w/o getting a darn job.. god help!!!

N yup.. definately don think can get thru any of the local Uni's with a GPA like tat.. hehehe.. but yup.. definately am going to pursue moi degree.. and definately in a recognised skool.. aiming for SIM.. hope to be in there studying by the start of next yr.. hehehe.. don kinda feel ani other private skools are up to take standard.. i mean..i till think repuation and recongization is really impt when it comes to choosing of skools.. soo yup.. now juz got lotsa things to settle down b4 i seriously give moi full concentration on finding a job..

But serisously.. really sad that its all ending soo fast.. poly days.. are definately one of the best days ani1 can ever have.. i cherish all the moments and all the frenz i have met during this time... its all gonna be missed.. :)

ooooooooooooooo

2009-02-12T05:09:00.000-08:00

Kinda the last day in school... 12 Feb 2009... and yup.. happy 9 mnths to baby kayla... soon the time comes to start the studying.. and exams.. juz another week or soo.. n i guess i wudnt be touching books for months before i start taking moi degree..

Seriously gotta start studying.. i guess im juz one of the few out there whu hasnt started studying when moi paper is next fri.. juz another week.. feeling the stress already.. soo juz wanna get OVER with it man!!!! i need a break....

Oh btw.. have been camwhoring alil too much these days in skool.. with the excuse of the last few days in TP.. soo yeap.. enjoyed it to the max.. just gonna miss everi single one i gotta knoe in TP.. loved the times and the moments shared by special ones.. m glad i gotta knoe some realli true frenz whom i knoe wud be there till the end.. :)

N yess.. i passed moi MA coursework.. thank mummy mary.. it was realli a miracle i muz say.. but i still sooo dislike the teacher... errr... cant believe she can realli be sooo unfair.. but yeap.. hope moi two other darlz fight their way thru tooo... fizah n pray love!!!

Aniwaeeee... Valentines day is juz round the corner... haha.. i mean juz two days away.. hmm... havent realli planned moi day out.. but m pretty excited for it... juz wanna laugh and have sooo much of fun this weekend b4 i start tearing moi hair into pieces studying.. hehehehe....

oh yess.. m still sticking to the bet made by fizah darlz n moi..... hehehehe... we shall see if we get it this year!!! heehehehe.... :)

Sadnesss...

2009-02-11T04:54:00.000-08:00

What else do i do best when sadness falls down on moi.. munch on chocolates and more chocolates... haiz....

Todae.. not realli the 2nd last day of school.. but tmr shall be the last day of all those normal lessons and school life.. next week is the start of revision week and moi first paper.. n here i am... not even touching moi books... scared to do soo... as usual.. prolonging it.. but sooner or later.. i have to get near them..

But... theres juz someting else out there bothering me....... apart from moi starting to miss school really badly already.. suddenly soo don wanna graduate... gonna miss poly days like hell.. have started feeling it already... n yup.. apart from that sad but wonder ful movie i catched with dina and fizah in skool library today.. im still dwelling over what happened last evening??

Haiz.. i mean.. i didnt wan it to ever affect moi again.. but sumhow or another.. it is.. n its juz upsetting.. sometimes love dosent only juz give happiness but a whole lot of sadness too.. i mean, if it was nv meant to be.. then y do god still make them love ya?? N i knoe of ppl whu cant find sum1 right to love them right out there.. but i guess having more then one person loving ya truely with soo much of love can also be hurting... i m sure ppl wud love be loved by many.. but really.. the feeling can suck.. when the love is soo true and sincere and you only can make one decision?? i mean.. we cant practically split ourselves into two rite?? bt y make them love ya. n u having to hurt them.. its really sad...

I donno... juz serisously don feel good right now.... hope this feeling leaves sooon... n hope all ends up being happy one fine day....

P.s: Getting back moi coursework results for moi MA tmr.. kinda realli frekaing me out big time... hoping to at least scrap thru it....

Missing ya...

Finally off to Marine Barrage

2009-02-07T22:07:00.000-08:00

Finally went to Marina Barrage last evening!! Awesome.. was simply soo special and loved everi min of it!!!

A perfect place that describes meeee.... juz love it sooo much!!! :) Thanksss........ smiles brought to me once again.. Peaceful.. the breeze... high up..... surrounded by water... was juz wat i needed from all those tensions and stress i have been going thru these days..

*filled with happinesss & smiles*

weeeeeweeeee..............

Cheers :)

A meaningful story..

2009-01-26T05:55:00.000-08:00

Message: can any message be more touching than this?

Daniel: I guess we are the left overs in this world.

Jasmine: I think so.. All of my friends have boyfriends & we are the only 2persons left in this world without any special someone in our lives.

Daniel: Yup! I don't know what to do.

Jasmine: I know! We'll play a game.

Daniel: What game?Jasmine: I'll be your girlfriend for 30 days & you will be my boyfriend.

Daniel: That's a great plan in fact, I don't have anything to do for thefollowing weeks..

DAY 1: They watched their first movie together & were both touched in the romantic film.

DAY 4: They went to the beach & had a picnic... Daniel & Jasmine had their quality time together.

DAY 12: Daniel invited Jasmine to a circus and they went to a Horror House.. Jasmine was scaredand she tried to touch Daniel's hand but by accident she touched someone else's and they both laughed..

DAY 14: They saw a fortune teller down the road and asked for their future. Thefortune teller said: 'My darlings, please don't waste the time of your lives... spend your time together happily.' Then tears flow from the teller's eyes.

DAY 20: Jasmine invited Daniel to go to the hill and they saw a meteor... Jasmine mumbled something.

DAY 28: They rode on a bus and because of the bumpy road, Jasmine gave her first kiss to Daniel by accident.

DAY 29:

11:37 pm

Daniel & Jasmine were sitting in the park where they first decided to play this game...

Daniel: I'm tired Jasmine... do you want any drinks? I'll buy you one.. I'll just go down the road..

Jasmine: Apple juice would be fine,thanks.

Daniel: Wait for me...20 minutes later... a stranger approached Jasmine.

Stranger: Are you a friend of Daniel?

Jasmine: Yes, why? What happened?

Stranger: A reckless drunken driver ran over Daniel & he is critical in the hospital.

11:57pm

The doctor came out from the emergency room & handed out an apple juice & a letter to Jasmine.

Doctor: We found this in Daniel's pocket.

Jasmine read the letter which says:

Jasmine, this past few days, I realized you are really a cute girl & I am falling for you.. your cherished smile, your everything when we played this game.. & before this game ends, I would like you to be my girlfriend for the rest of mylife. I love you, Jasmine...

Jasmine crumples the paper & shouted..'Daniel! I don't want you to die...I love you... Remember that night we saw a meteor? I mumbled something.. I wished that we would be together forever & never end this game. Please don't leave me, Daniel... I love you, you cannot do this to me

Then the clock strikes 12Daniel's heart stop pumping

THEN IT WAS THE 30th DAY...

************************************************************************************
Always love your loved ones & show them how you feel before it's too late.. You will never know when they will be gone from your embrace.. If you were given a time to bestow petals ofeverlasting compassion & love to your love ones, today is the day. Love them while they are still here...

Read this in a mail sent to moi by a fren.. n seriously it nearly brought tears... Kinda realised theres no point in we humans always complaining time after time.. instead.. y don we take this opportunity to love our loved ones.. be more true to them... and show them how much u love them... theres still time.. soo y not?? :)

The virgo

2009-01-26T05:44:00.000-08:00

VIRGO - The Perfectionist

Dominant in relationships.. Conservative. Always wants the last word.Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager.Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Ha rsh.Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.

Haha.. i think its sooo true.... :)

Arathi.. Dina.. Madeline..

2009-01-23T07:04:00.000-08:00

Simply love moi two darlings the most.. hahahaha.... sometimes its realli nutting like friends i guess.. hehehe.. as long as u knoe whu to trust.. n whu to rely on... not all frenz can be trusted though.. but well.. i knoe it well enuff.. whus the best... n i thank god for them.. love them to the bits..

Aniwae.. FINALLY.. the day has come.. moi motivation is back!!!!!!!!!! Hoooray..... but yeap.. kinda still feel normal though.. hahaha... but lots more exciting days to come.... Cant wait.. got two movies to catch.. gotta go to soo mani places.. and yup.. definately looking forward to visiting qian huis hse for CNY... its gonna be sooo much of fun and laughter... cant wait...

*excited*..

*awaiting*

Day out at the riverside

2009-01-22T06:10:00.000-08:00

Tommorrow shall be the day... not sure why i don feel that way im suppose to feel... haha.. someting is wrong somewhere.. but well.. guess like i said.. the independence have covered too much of me already.. haha.. once i hear.. get too see... im sure it wud all start rushing back.. just got moi horoscope read by moi darlz binte.. and cudnt help but relate it to it somehow.. well.. juz tot of the first thing on moi mind.. n that popped out.. soo guess it has to be it.. but the answer only awaits tmr.. after two whole weeks.. cant believe it.. we shall see how it goes.. cant wait.. feelingless at the same time.. excited.. something is soooo wrong with me.. haha..

Oh yes.. soo wanted to donate blood today.. called up the blood bank to check out the timings but thanks to moi dear darlings dina and arathi.. i didnt end up going.. soo planning to make a trip there this coming sat.. donno y.. but juz have the urge to go for it.. its not as if its moi first time.. but guess.. i tot of it.. soo juz wanna get it done.. like it said.. now a daes like as become more of it.. if u wanna do it.. go ahead.. don let ani1 anithing stop ya.. its ur life.. ur wish.. sooo for everi decision made.. juz do it.. living life this way feels soo much more less tensed and im loving it..

Yeap.. soo instead of heading over to the blood bank.. we ended up going boat quay and relaxing near the riverside and it was awesome.. ended up meeting the star too.. haha.. faizal.. who else.. and start snappin more n more pics... listening to songs.. translating of lyrics and toking n laughing.. seriously it was really relaxing to ones mind.. enjoyed it... wasnt a regrettful trip though.. just love moi gals the best.. haha..

*waiting for tmr*

Weddings

2009-01-21T06:35:00.000-08:00

Just heard a shocking yet one of the happiest news ever...

Moi one and only precious cuzin.. fren.. and loved one is planning to get ROM next year...

Seriously m sooooooo glad and happy for her man!!!!

All the best to you guys... Shamini and Danz!!!!

N yess.. another good news.. heard early today.. another darlz of mine.. her wedding date has been confirm this year 9th Dec 2009. Realli am sooooo happy for them tooo... Deepali and Amar..

We are seriously all turning old.. its time to think of the next step in life... Haha... but i have a long long way to goo... n i sure don mind that wait as its all worth it...

For now... just wanna wish these two couples ALL THE BEST guys!!! Love ya always... :)

New life

2009-01-21T05:32:00.000-08:00

Survived four incredible days, unbelieving i should say but still ended up surviving didnt i? So gotta take some credit for it.. *smilez* Just another day of survival and there moi motivation returns! haha.. Oh yeah.. got thiz motivation thingy from moi skool y'dae.. they were giving out free ice cream for those whu wrote down on a piece of paper what their motivation was.. n yup.. being moi.. i wrote it down.. but didnt end up getting the ice cream as i was late for class.. came back for it after tutorial and they cleared up.. *sad* soo yeap.. waiting for that motivation to return.. pretty much excited for it!! Got lotsa things planned out for the weekend.. its gonna be a fun and long weekend.. realli looking forward to it!! Oh yess... ended up bumping into moi darlz Neela todae.... yeah.. was sooooo nice cin her after like wat feel like months now.. missing tat lady of moi soo much!! Told her of some cambodia trip i was toking about and she said she shall confirm with me.. if its a yes.. there we tooo shall end up in Cambodia.. hehehe.. Lets hope soo ah... for now i soo need to save up for moi cruise trip with moi darlz cuming March.. haha.. saving saving time.. i seriously think i need that trip badly.. especially after all the stress skool has been giving mee.. soo yeap.. *excited*
Kinda feel the independence running in me these days.. makes moi have the feel of contentment when i realise it time after.. for som1 like me i sud say its really someting that needs to be proud off.. well guess the reason again.. my motivation. Haha.. but trust me.. without that motivation its gonna be a whole lot harder.. life wudnt be the same. That is a sure thing. And yup... realised that living each day and not worrying abt tmr helps alot. It keeps one's mind free and lessens the tensions which awaits tmr... n yup.. doing wat u have always wanted.. not restricting urself.. buying watever u wan.. nt stopping urself.. helps.. trust me.. the little joy u get out of them definately keeps ya going with that smile. Guess i used to really go by the books too often before.. rules.. routines and stuff.. not that im not now.. but its different.. like i said.. living each day with a smile.. taking things easier and juz taking everithing in a positive note.

Gues thats realli how life sud be lead.. pleased with it.. satisfied... what more can i expect.. :)

Very Irresistible

2009-01-19T20:33:00.000-08:00

My new Givenchy....

Love moi mum for this..

Now its all Mine...

Simply love it man.... :)

Living in the heart

2009-01-19T06:58:00.001-08:00

I kinda realise some thing, it may be due to these few weeks or lets juz say a month.. and yup.. these two days.. oh btw.. its day two today.. 3 more days to go and i am still going strong.. Not bad ah!! Impressed with moiself.. but yup.. i guess i found out the reason to it.. and thats wat i realised...

Maybe.. its cuz... when that some1 has become sooo important to ya.. soo important in your life.. even when the person is not around or within no reach of contact.. u might miss.. but not that much.. and y is that so?? Well... maybe its cuz ur living with that person each day.. each min.. thats y the word miss rarely shows up. Not living as in physically but mentally.. it actually seems a lil mental to moi at the start.. but realise that was it i guess.. and instead of missing that some1.. i get to enjoy that feeling inside.. pretty weird.. but interesting and peaceful. lol..

Okay... i think i can really can confusing sometimes.. i mean, i guess once u feel it.. u wudnt find it confusing nor weird.. it happens.. haha..

Bt watever it may be.. i still wan the days to pass fast... :) Nitez to all...

Day One

2009-01-18T06:15:00.000-08:00

[DAY ONE]

Four more days to goo...... four long days more....

First time in 4 yrs plus......

Expected it to be feeling worst.. but guess its stronger this time round...

But again.. its juz day one... for more days to go....

May the days pass fast...

I knoe how much u mean to me..

2009-01-14T05:47:00.001-08:00

Stress is soooo killing me these days......

Sadness.....

Missing some1 soo badly....

Pressurized with things..

Mind thinks......

Days to pass fast......

Peace needed.....

When will i get over it, never seems to end.. days pass.. but those worried days still come by... let it all be over.. soo much needed...

Cant seem to get over the song from Rab Ne Bana di Jodi...

"i see god in you.. i dono what to do.. i see god in you.. and i donno what to do.. i wanna bow down to ya.. i donno what to do... "

Reminds me of special moments... moments that can never be forgottan.. once in a lifetime..

Hate studying

2009-01-13T03:45:00.000-08:00

(This is an pretty old pic.. miss moi curls.. )

Just hate the feel of having to study the whole day.. non stop.. having some time for moiself only now.. n hmm.. not actually.. limited time.. gotta start researching for moi projs.. get lotsa stuff done... seriously this life is suddenly taxing me out.... im juz a inch away from screaming!!!!

But yeap.. finally completed studying for moi legal aspects paper today..even though i got half a chap more to finsh up.. hehe.. but am glad i managed to do that much already.. being me.. tmr yet another irritating day.. gotta touch moi books for IB.. don understand y the tutors have to pile us with lotsa tests and projs at the same time.. i mean.. we only got a short sem.. and they are giving us work like tat of an normal sem.. stresss... Finally wen i tot its gonna be over.. i have another headache.. its never ending.. when will the pull stop ever come.. i am waiting.. haiz...

For now.. may the weeks pass fast.. hate the next coming week too.. that wudnt be really cus of skool werk.. but... some issuess....... i need the weeks to fly........

Exausted...

I see god in him

2009-01-11T06:28:00.000-08:00

Just hunged up the phone with moi darlz binte.. haha.. after much kpo-ing... as usual.. us.. never stopping!! Yup.. and after finished our IB forum together.. whew..... at least got one down.. well.. gota lots more things cuming up this week.. but seriously.. i think im gonna start living the each day onli.. the more i think abt tmr... the more it stresses moi much.. days arent tat good these days.. haiz..

Oh yes.. y'dae.. didnt end up going Marina Barrage.. but it was an awesome day.. got moi pretty scandals.. and yup.. ended up watching a powerpack movie... "Rab Ne Banadi Jodi" It was seriously a superb movie i swear... Well.. i do knoe wat love is.. but the movie really in another inspiration for love. Really... Im still in love with it.. the words and the meaning... guess that is true love ah..

I mean i knew this before.. but guess the movie reminded me of it again.. love.. the real meaning of it. Loving without expecting anything in return, not even a single hint of love back.. Loving innocently with ur whole heart and taking in everithing for the one u love.. whether u like it or not..

N why is that so??? The only reason... never to see her cry.. and always needing to see that smile on her face... The movie gave the hero many oppostunities to question his wife?? but did he?? that is the real qns?? he didnt.... N thatz love too..

Never questioning the one you love.. never suspecting... She says she wans someting.. he agrees.. not asking.. what.. where.. with whom... finally she went for dancing classes as allowed by him.. n she get a guy dancing partner... does he question?? no??? Even though its him in the end.. but he definately wasnt wannting her to love the guy whu wasnt the real him... and the pain he took when she did.... n still loved her truely.. He feels happy for her when shes happy.. even though its not smth we would wan to do in life... all for juz the love of a gal... issint that wat true love is all about?? well.. i feel it is... theres definatley no need to change completely for the one u love.. but he did.. just to bring that smile for her.. not giving a tot about himself... seriously... that is the love..

It mite not be existing much in this world these days.. but im sure in those million lovers.. there is tis love.. i knoe it... wudnt ever deny it..

I love this love.. cuz i have seen god in him...... :)

Goooooo catch the movie.. u wud understand it all............................

Cheers guys.. have a great week ahead!!!!

Off to marina barrage

2009-01-09T18:57:00.000-08:00

Today...

10 Jan 2009...

Morning now....

Evening later....

Off to Marina Barrage....

Excited....

*Smiles*

*Leaps of joy*

More pictures to comeeeee..........

Ps: Getting moi new scandels todae.... binte and moi love.... hahaha!!!

Oh yesss.... suddenly have been thinking of two particular ppl in moi life.. and kinda miss them.. hmm.. alot actually... hahaha...

OLIVER (Really hope ur doing gr8 oli...we still got alot of things to catch up on.. miss ya)

&

SONIA (babe i knoe i was chatting with ya earlier today.. maybe cuz it brought back memories.. haha.. miss ya)

Cheers guys... :)

Diamond Love

2009-01-08T20:00:00.000-08:00

My Diamond Love

Still mesmerizing over it... never ever getting over it i guess.. well.. its friday.. no skool day!! yeah... at last.. finally i got some time for some rest.. needed it sooo badly.. after all those studying.. proj submission and soo on.. not as if its over yet.. still on going.. but im giving a rest for just todae.. wanna have as much rest as possible.. n yup catching up on moi slp... having slpless nite... pity moi mom.. due to moi non stop coughing.. she keeps awake... its like two weeks now and theres no sign of recovery.. goodness.. how much more hot drinks am i gonna have!!! hmmm.... aniwae..... the week had been pretty bad actually... really stressed out... feeling sooo shitty... with lotsa things in mind... headaches... coughs.... haiz... knowing that the next 2 weeks are gonna be even more shitty...

Guess independence is growing within me a little more these days.... haha.. choiceless.. sometimes can get realli frustrating but have to be dealt with... no running away.. soo yeap.. gonna keep moiself buzi the whole two weeks and really hope the days run fast!! for now.. im sooo gonna enjoy this weekend.. to the max..... deserve it badly.... :) Have a great weekend to all!!

2nd Jan 2009... A Special Day..

2009-01-03T06:06:00.000-08:00

Y'dae.. the 2nd of Jan.. still the start of a new yr.. was one of the happiest days of moi life!!!!!!! It basically started of as per normal.. no school but ended up going and staying there till late afternoon to complete moi SIP report.. n yess... got it done.. AT LAST!!! after weeks... goodness... and yup.. then came one of the happiest moments..

trust me.. happiest moments....

2nd Jan 2009....

1800 hours....

At plaza Singapura....

When over... was suppose to end over to marina barrage.. heard it was a superb place.. but plan got changed.. ended up at PS.. when over to have dinner at swensens.. moi fav black pepper seafood spagetti... with chocolate sundae... and yup... grilled sambal fish... and in the middle.. baked pasta.. ok ok.. i knoe thats like alot of food for two... guess we were juz pigging out!! hahahaha.... n there came moi surprise... moi xmas gift.. handed over to moi... hahahahahahahaha........

shock..

tears..

happiness....

a pinch of sadness... (no reason why)

and just lots lots happiness..

FINALLY got it... moi first ever diamond ring!!!!!!! wasnt moi first ever diamond though... but its the ring i was wanted for like years now.. hahahaha.. FINALLY!!! trust me... have nv taken pics of moi hand that much b4... LOVED IT!!! its the 3rd now.. but still feel that happiness inside... really.. one of moi happiest moments.. wud nv forget that day. . ever!! n yup.. after the WOW.. wonderful dinner.. headed over to watch "YES MAN".. 2050hours movies.. was an inspring movie i should say.. a complete for the day.. perfect.. filled with soo much of fun and laughter.. guess.. i did start of New yr with lotsa laughter!! hahaha... m glad... wanna rock this year.. with lotsa happiness..

Seriously the best start for a new year... :) Thanks alot.................................

N yup... then today... the 3rd.... had to leave soo sooon... i knoe its juz for a few days.. 6 days... but it seems sooo long nw.. cudnt bear to see ya walk away... felt the pinch.. waiting.. hoping for the days to run fast.....

Cheerss...

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2009

2008-12-31T22:18:00.000-08:00

Its a complete NEW year... 2009!!

Started my year with moi closed loved ones.. people i love and treasure deeply!! It was simply a blast.. loved everi min of it!! The fun and laughter.. laughed till i practically teared.. stomach hurt.. goodness.. juzt thinking abt it now brings a smile!! Hope to laugh this much the whole year with lots more happiness.. :) Thanks Shamini darlz.. Danesh.. Vinnod.. Diane and moi bestie Samad for really making moi start a blast!! Love ya guys jus soooo much.. n im sure u knoe it!!! hahaha!! Yeah.. headed over to clarke quay for the countdown.. dancing to some hard rock and rock and roll music.. was sooo much of fun.. haha.. funny but we simply enjoyed it man.. then came the balloons falling all over us.. haha.. was simple awesome.. after the countdown at the stage we headed over to cineleisure for dinner.. but not forgetting on the way.. the spraying and running ard.. OMG.. felt like kids all over again.. haha.. got sprayed at untill i ended up looking like santa claus sis!! hahahaha... but yeah.. its was a whole lot of fun.. trust moi.. awesome.. one of the best countdowns i have ever had!!

Cineleisure.. burger king.. the unique ones having turkey bacon and the rest grilled chicken!! Had our darling darnesh turing into a gay over the year... hahahahaha.... once it striked 12am.. there he turned from a real man to a female..definatley someting wrg somewhere.. pity vinnod and samad man.. had to please our dear darneshini!! hahahaha.... Was the loudest at BK.. laughing and bringing back old stories... was sooo much of fun!! Then its was all time.. home sweet home.. seriously i needed the wash up.. was filled smelling of soap all over.. sticky and god... definately disgusting.. but all worth it! hahaaha....

Seriously.. thanks guys... no words to decribe it.. AWESOME!!! check out the pics man...

A VERY HAPPY AND BLESSED NEW YEAR TO ALL!!!!! :)

Happy birthday NEELA

2008-12-26T18:15:00.000-08:00

The days seemed to have ran extremly fast.. there was once, i was waiting soo much for xmas to come... shopping.. dancing.. fun.. n now.. it seriously ran soo fast!! haha.. but its not over yet.. got many more hses to go visiting.. have more turkeys, roasted lamb, spagettis, more lock cakes and many many more palagarams (MY FAV). Dont feel the occasion without having the right food on the table. Guess, i have definately put on some weight after feasting for the pass 2 daes.. n yup... sick too!! Soo hate falling sick.. i mean whu dosent rite.. its juz soo irritating to be sneezing non stop.. coughing as if i have sum terminal illness and feeling soo weak to move ard for some fun. But definately not gonna let moi lil flu spoil moi whole xmas, still got lots more to enjoy.

Oh btw.. it was moi fav darlz bdae y'dae... soooo here it goes.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY NEELA darlz!!! Seeing her later.. for a indoor show at esplanade.. pretty excited.. well i have always favored going for theatrette shows, soo this is one of the few. M sure its gonna be a whole lot of fun, with the elegance and poshiness.

N well... MC, which in this term stands for medical certificate can really help one alot.. haha.. but not falling sick.. getting to spend a lil but more time with close ones.. having more time to tok.. thanks to MC.. haha.. it helps..

But yup.. m seriously waiting to get rid of this flu.. for both of us.

Its time for shopping....

2008-12-21T03:50:00.000-08:00

Xmas is just a few days away... n guess wat... shopping is still not done... cant believe it... seriously the mood is just lost this year... or maybe its jus taking a longer time to be felt, but whatever it is.. just cant wait for the 24th.. not only for xmas mass, celebrations, dressing up, snapping.... but coz.. some1s coming back.. yeah!!!! cant wait.. pretty excited.. but sure do want to make this xmas a blast too... like every other year.. one of moi fav days in a year.. :)

Oh yesss... went for confession the other day with sis.. n kinda got moi thinking alot.. sooo yup.. tot abt it n decided.. m soo gonna quit someting for the new year to come.. its not as if im addicted to it or someting.. i mean.. its far from that.. but just tot.. gonna stop it completely.. guess.. it got moi thinking.. mainly it just dosent suit moi PERSONALITY!! hahaha.. far different from the rest.. HAHA! Yup.. really excited for the new year to come, soo much to be done, soo many better people to meet, im sure its gonna be another great here.. especially with your loved one beside ya always.. :) But definatley feel that some things need to be left behind if you really wanna feel the happiness u've always longed for.. it might be things, people, aniting, but its best to throw it all away n start afresh..

Kinda realised moi change... change for the better... change for the future... pleased with it.. n it just brings a smile.. satisfied with life.. nutting more needed.. maybe just the need to find sum1 like moi.. haha.. pretty hard i knoe.. being fussy.. picky.. perfectionist.. thinking the way i do... really hard.. but im sure its all possible.. maybe in the new year... lets c how... :)

NOW.........

i just wanna gooooooo SHOPPING.....

4th day...

2008-12-15T04:13:00.001-08:00

Hey.. back once again... well guess most or all of moi previous posts has really been soo emo... well.. i kinda seriously blog only during those times acutally.. soo yeap... for a change today.. even though im still in the midst of moi emo state... lets have someting nice to hear..

Finally spend a huge amount of time in skool today after such a long time with moi darlz.. after meetings.... chatting... lunch.. gotta catcha movie with moi darlz like old times.. was pretty fun and simply loved it!! Tmr yet another exciting day.. movie marathon... excited.. anxious.. and then its back to another buzi week of projects.. assignments.. but let the days run fast.. it helps in a way.. greatly...

awaits yet another day..

Event

2008-12-07T23:08:00.000-08:00

Oh yess... completed yet another event on sat... 21st bdae party.. went pretty well and was kinda impressed... soo yup.. just a few pics here to share... :)

A week

2008-12-06T20:22:00.000-08:00

Wouldnt really say it lasted an exact week.. maybe 6 days.. Pretty short izznt it.. just taken aback.. past was when it was not able to be w/o each other.. but the present reflects the opposite.. surprising on how things and people can change in years.. months.. but understandable. Me moiself can see a difference in me.... a total different person from b4 and im loving the new moi.. feel it suits me better and guess i have finally agreed to live life the way i want it too... took it in that note.

N yes.. back to the week.. ran pretty fast.. with alot of thoughts in mind.. as usual.. pressure.. but then again.. after maybe a month.. heard those words again.. hurting.. pericing.. definately dont deserve it. But why were they said? Especially from a person close within.. person trusted sooo much.. maybe that was one of the reasons to the amount of hurt. But really.. sadness...

I guess.. sometimes.. people need to learn how to talk to gals.. whether in anger or not.. i dont think pouring out such words are going to make oneself feel relieved.. in fact i guess it would only bring pain upon another.. and the worst thing would be telling them that you arent regretful of those words... upsetting.. hurting.. but nutting can be done..

Maybe like what some say.. try not to dig your own grave.. if you knoe it brings upon hurt.. maybe its best moving away permanantly.. guess that would solve it all....

Unsure

2008-12-04T21:22:00.001-08:00

Once again.. exists.. returns after months.. feel contented.. glad and happy.. but another side filled with confusion once again.. fear.. unsure of things. Why go through such a sensation.. necessary or unnecessary.. again unaware.

Recent days have been filled with too many things to be said.. thought about.. ran extremly fast with many negative n positive points.. seeing of friends betrayal.. hearing of friends hurts and sadness.. too many politics around.. suspiciousness of loved ones.. tears.. returning of special ones.. bad or good.. confusion.. too many things to be stated... Days running fast.. Whats the feeling inside called?? unsure.... pratically unsure of everything.. just wanna rest the mind.. n go with the flow...

It happened

2008-12-01T05:24:00.000-08:00

Last evening... did expect it to ever happen.. but it did... rem the rejection said previously.. haha.. wasnt really rejected.. happened.. soo yup.. had an awesome dinner at lagnaa last evening.. with the spice level tearing my eyes.. but enjoyed it.. the walk to ps and as usual.. the insults.. the arguements.. the craziness.. it all felt good once again.. pretty much enjoyed it... :) am glad it happened.. then once again.. came hm pretty late... but had an awesome day out..

Today.. glad moms back home.. hoooray.. kinds missed her terribly.. :) N yup... yet again.. no calls... no msgs... someting wrg after being right.. pretty weird.. unsure of things once again.. confusion... well.. life still goes on...

back to skool tmr.... pretty much excited.. after months... :)

2008-11-27T18:35:00.001-08:00

Unbelievable i should say, surprised that such an incident acutally occured.. haha.. but thinking about it, feel it was for the better... again i stress the point that its better to talk things out with people then keep it inside and never voicing out. Soo the best part of this was voicing out.. and now.. feel soo much more better.. But yea, it was definately upsetting such a situation had to happen, but issnt it better that it happened and gottan it solved? No holding grudges and feelings inside.. and making gaps bigger and stuff.. soo its way better.. really! :)

But definately learnt a lesson from this.. haha.. funny.. but yup.. never force anyone to be with someone they just can see themselves with animore.. soo yup.. tot it was jus all an misunderstanding that can be solved.. but guess i was wrg.. sometimes if its just not meant to be.. it wudnt.. soo yeah.. learnt that..

Aniwae.. its finally my last day of internship.. kinda feel sad.. hmm.. definately gonna miss this place i guess.. miss the surfing of net non-stop and soo on... haha.. i mean common, that has been moi life for the past three months or soo.. soo im sure deep down.. each individual would tend to miss it alil at least.. yup.. n as i said.. i have no idea is bloggin would be that often too.. haha.. so yeah.. kinda excited for many more things cuming up.. :)

Expected

2008-11-26T21:10:00.000-08:00

Hmm.. shall i say expected or not expected.. well.. guess it has to be expected.. but deep inside still had that hope.. but sumhow faced that rejection. But hey.. didnt feel tat bad as i knoe that rejection wasnt really happy on the other side too... well.. when both is in need of it.. but cant.. cuz of sum sort of ego and circumstances.. it can really be extremly heartbreaking. But as far as im concern.. m glad i did take tat effort to ask.. satisfied with that.. even though not with the ans.. pretty upsetting.. definately.. who wudnt be.. soo yup.. guess gotta still live with it.. get used to it.. wats the sadness in this... definately being the first time not being able to be there with there and be part of at least a small part of that special day.. 5 yrs.. 1st time.. pretty upsetting izzint it.. well... have to carry on... its not like the end of the world rite?? life is all about forgetting those unhappy moments and living it the way you wanna see it... pretty hard i knoe.. but when is comes to being choiceless... then you gotta just adapt to it rite?? But still... wishing to be part of the special day can bring in lotsa of happiness to one... but when not needed.. its better to just back off...

Oh well.. another issue.. well... i practically created this blog cus i was staring at the com for the past 3 mnths... nutting to do when u juz end up stoning.. n now its like finally over.. back to skool on monday... kinda sad to be leaving this place.. but kinda excited to be back in skool too... soo yeah.. being me.. rarely even touch the com whenever im back in skool... as usual buzi with lots more stuff.. haha.. sooo lets c how often i wud be blogging here... it might be once in a blue moon i guesss... hehehe... we shall c how it goess... soo yup... cheerz.. :)

A lil bit of glamour once again

2008-11-24T23:28:00.000-08:00

Once again.. some addiction... stoning at work.. filled with boredem... simply in love with dresses... falling in love with them... :) Own too many.. but definately more to come... on the way..... cheers love...

2008-11-24T18:28:00.000-08:00

Ever been through being extremly excited and filled with happiness and anxiety.. but get it all ruined in secs? Pretty much frustrating.. Especially when the feeling of contentment is more then usual and when being enjoyed greatly. Well i guess it tends to happen.

Seriously don understand why sadness should be filled in when the other party arent bothered. Well.. its definately not worth the emotion and strain.. but feeling a feel dosent come planned rite? So yeah.. has to be gone through.. another stage in life i guess.. Definately an hard job i have to say. Knowing or assuming or even by seeing that some1 ur being away from is practically smiling more then ever now.. more then used to be... sadness fills when u realise that happiness come when you arent part of it.. when always wished that it came only due to your presence... Well arent sure if its done on purpose or its the fact... but what ever it maybe.. pretty much have to except the fact..

A special day coming yet.. afraid of asking.. rejection.. happens.. haha.. advised against it.. but principles overshadowing.. Not sure how too.. Not sure why.. but still want too... Pretty much taxed out with this whole issue.. Thought it would be easy to end.. but not... for this moment.. all can be done.. wait and hope.......

YouWereOnceWhoMadeMeSmile... NowYourTheOneWhuMakesMeCry.....

22 November 2008

2008-11-23T17:10:00.000-08:00

Simply had a perfect weekend.. hmm.. Loved everi single moment of it.. guess.. it was one of the best days in life.. maybe there are more to come.. definately.. but seriously.. never felt happier.. :) The sensation exists again... all over.. going thru it again.. and simply loving it.. enjoying it.. guess.. one would never be able to feel it if the emotion dosent exist... Lucky enough.. infact... very lucky.. yet complains still occur.. i guess its juz human nature.. but having to complain when you have gottan one of the best.. simply can be unreasonable.. It has to be stopped.. haha.. it wud.. definately.. sometimes it amazes people.. when you feel u've nutting.. but the actual fact is that you have got the best with ya.. but you just don seem to realise it and seek for more.. but i guess once its realised.. the emotion felt is just up above the skys.... and the need to treausure that diamond increases...

Whatever it may be.. feeling tat feel.. it is one of a kind.... :)

2008-11-20T01:22:00.000-08:00

Was pretty much packed up the whole of last weekend.. and had a wonderfully long one too.. ended up cuming back to werk at mid and still feel soo drained! Oh yes.. kinda screwed up a special day which i had all planned out... regretful.. hating it.. but yup.. the hope to make up for it tis cuming sat.. soo pretty much excited for the weekends... gonna be yet another busy end.. but definately an enjoyable one i should say..

With regards to certain issues heard.. affected.. kinda disturbed.. number of days.. till this mintue.. got it pretty much cleared up.. toked it out and yup.. doubts definately answered and feel a sense of relief.. wasnt really much of a concern to me.. but well.. being me.. always getting affected by issues as such.. but guess got it sorted out and feel a sense of deepened closeness now.. Guess smtimes its really better to tok things out with people and get it cleared out.. somehow it makes both the parties feel a sense of relief and definately closeness.. glad it happened... :) Love ya for that... u knoe whu you are.. :)

Flying to far east in about 15 mins time................. whaaaooooooo....

Some Glamour

2008-11-13T00:29:00.000-08:00

Feeling pretty excited for later... this week is simply packed with all moi precious ones birthdays.. oh btw.. happy birthdae deep.. and happy advanced birthdae wishes bintee!!!!! Week filled with sooo much of fun, laughter, enjoyment and yup.. definately surprises... cafe del mar... here i cum....... hahaha..

oh yess.... was pretty bored at werk.. n yess.. a beautiful darling of mine.. sarah recommended a site to mee.. n yup.. when there n got pretty much addicted to the editted of pics.. haha.. here are some... muackssss..........

2008-11-10T22:57:00.000-08:00

All of a sudden am totally missing soo many people in moi life...

ANU

JANA

SHANKY

SHANGARI

REENAH

POHLING

SONIA

NAZI

LIZA

PRAY

Some has been like years since i saw them.......... if ur reading this... knoe it.. i miss you okieeee!!!!! Hahahaha...... Suddenly.. tot of all those old timesssss...wooaaaaaa...

Bleeding Love

2008-11-10T17:57:00.000-08:00

Song of the day... song of my current mood........ mixed emotion... dwelling....

Closed off from love
I didn't need the pain
Once or twice was enough
And it was all in vain Time starts to pass
Before you know it you're frozen

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking I'm going crazy

But I don't care what they say I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and

I Keep Bleeding Keep, keep bleeding in love
I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding in love
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding in love
You cut me open

Dosent Feel The Same Way

2008-11-09T22:40:00.000-08:00

It hurts when you really miss someone and are not able to contact that person.. but what hurts more is the knowing that same someone dosent even think about you when being missed terribly... Guess everithing would have been going fine.. till that dae... sudnt have gone.. kinda regret in a way.. maybe things wouldnt be soo bad now... maybe the pain n hurt wudnt be appearing once again.. thoughts were strong... mind was strong.. guess the heart wasnt.. pretty bad tough.. hope of getting rid of it forever.. lasted for sometime.. gained greater happiness.. but suddenly feel it all drowning once again... feeling that same sensation.. never wanted again. Despising it.. dreading it.. trying hard once again but it fails repeatedly.. when would it ever be over.. when time after time.. thoughts get lost... when that happiness and peacefullness appears.. in some sort of way, the memories stand right infront of you.. haunting you.. meant to be memories of happiness.. but it seems to be ruining the current happiness away.. juz the thoughts. Pierces pretty much when you feel that way but the other party dosent seem to even knoe such a feeling exsist... being in thier own world of happiness and joy.. y is it soo simple and easy for some.. n terribly hard for the rest... as said.. life is never fair.. but inflicting pain upon people who dont deserve it.. tatz not fair.. but guess.. thatz what has been happening... sometimes never understand life... wish i did....

hoping.. trying.. yet another attempt...

November

2008-11-03T21:53:00.000-08:00

Here it begins.. another month... a month closer to one of moi fav months of the year.. n yup.. definately a month filled with birthdays of all moi closest and loved ones in moi life... Its gonna be filled with parties... preparations.. thinking.. n as usual.. stress.. haha.. but all worth it... :)

N yup.. counting down from today.. it would be exactly 18 days till i leave this place i've been stuck with for the past 2 months or soo... but hmm.. thinking abt it.. im starting to feel that im kinda gonna be missing this place once my attachment is over n done with.. well.. guess its usual for everione.. getting used to the environment.. being too used to the routine and being comfy with your collegues.. eventually.. it would result in this.. soo.. gonna juz enjoy the last few weeks here i guess.. And it would be back to skool.. yeah.... well.. still don understand why human life is always filled with complains.. time after time... i mean.. when we're at werk.. we complain.. n when we're in skool.. we complain.. n when we stay home.. we complain.. haha.. guess.. thatz life.. we are never happy with it.. even if its close to perfection or not...

sooo yeah.. planning.. take things easy.. let the worries drown.. instead of dwelling over it... n yup.. living life to the happiest each moment.. hmm..... i shall try..

Lovess :)

Songs of the day

2008-11-03T21:31:00.000-08:00

Kinda got addicted to these songs.. love it.... juz makes moi day...... Juz something to share with you guys....... cheers... :)

******************************************************************************

[RIGHT NOW - AKON]

It's been so long that I haven't seen your face I'm Tryna be strong But the strength I have is washing away it wont be long before i get you by my side And just hold you, tease you, squeeze you Tell you what's been on my mind

Girl I know mistakes were made between us two And we show our selfs that night even said somethings weren't true why'd you go and haven't seen my girl since then why can't it be the way it was cause you were my homie lover and friend

I can't lie I miss you much Watching everyday that goes by I miss you much Till i get you back I'm gonna Try Yes I miss you much You are the apple of my eye Girl I miss you much I miss you much I can't lie I miss you much Watching everyday that goes by I miss you much Tell I get you back I'm gonna Try Yes I miss you much Yes you are the apple of my eye Girl I miss you much I miss you much

I wanna make up right now na na I wanna make up right now na na Wish we never broke up right now na na we need to link up right now na na I wanna make up right now na na I wanna make up right now na na Wish we never broke up right now na na we need to link up right now na na I want you to fly with me want you to fly I miss how you lie with me miss how you lie Just wish you could dine with me wish you could dine One that would grind with me One that would grind I want you to fly with me want you to fly I miss how you lie with me Ohh miss how you lie Just wish you could dine with me wish you could dine One that would grind with me Ohh One that would grind

I wanna make up right now na na

I wanna make up right now na na Wish we never broke up right now na na we need to link up right now na na

I wanna make up right now na na I wanna make up right now na na Wish we never broke up right now na na we need to link up right now na na

*************************************************************************************

[What you got - Colby O Donis Feat Akon]

Konvict, Konvict

Oooh Oooh Oooh OoohOooh Oooh Oooh Oooh

[Verse 1: Colby O'Donis]

I peeped you on the phoneJust showin' off ya stonesAnd notice that that pinky ring is right enough babyI know you're not aloneBut I could just be wrongThe way them fellas houndin' and sizin' you up baby[Hook:]And I like the way you take advantage of every man you loveI see, I seem to know your game girlBut I don't mind if ya come and play ya thug just don't talk too muchI see, I see it so you don't have to say a wordYeah those guys wanna come treat ya rightCause you're sweeter than apple pieEverything that you want you gotGirl you know that you need to stopMost beautiful thing in sightAlways takin' on the spotlightAlways in the club lookin hotGirl you know that you need to stop

[Chorus:]

Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Girl you know that you need to stopAlways talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Girl you know that you need to stop

[Verse 2: Colby O'Donis]

Girl I can tell you want something to loveThat's why you hold on to everything that pass you byCan't resist girl one can't lieNow tell if you are here for meOr everybody watchin' you shake from left to rightThe way you move got me hypnotized

[Hook:]

The way you take advantage of every man you loveI see, I seem to know your game girlBut I don't mind if ya come and play ya thug just don't talk too muchI see, I see it so you don't have to say a wordYeah those guys wanna come treat ya rightCause you're sweeter than apple pieEverything that you want you gotGirl you know that you need to stopMost beautiful thing in sightAlways takin' on the spotlightAlways in the club lookin hotGirl you know that you need to stop

[Chorus:]

Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Eh)Girl you know that you need to stopAlways talkin' bout what you got (Oooh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Oooh)Always talkin' bout what you got (Oooh)Girl you know that you need to stop[Verse 3: Akon]Our eyes away from you girl when you get on the floor and do what you doAnd errbody wanna come back to that bod and kind of remind myself I'm like youBe sure that type drive a man crazy and snatch him away from his ladyNo matter how hard the man hold back he'll end up callin' you babyAnd they never really know what to do once you expose that thang you doYa had him crawlin' on hands and knees and ya find a way to get him out that cheeseAnd why ya thinkin' that you the only dude she off in the mall livin' off of youLettin' errbody know she got you but now you feel like a fool

[Hook:]

Yeah those guys wanna come treat ya rightCause you're sweeter than apple pieEverything that you want you gotGirl you know that you need to stopMost beautiful thing in sightAlways takin' on the spotlightAlways in the club lookin hotGirl you know that you need to stop

[Chorus:]

LOVE THESE SONGS!!!!

Thinking

2008-10-30T02:07:00.000-07:00

Well.. i guess i have to admit this.. or ask this question out?? Is it really true that when one laughs alot.. feels sooo happy and enjoys alot.. soon after something or rather some issues occur and it would all turn to sadness?? I mean.. i've got frenz who are a lil supertious.. n smtimes even i tend to believe in those too.. hmm.. correction.. maybe not believe.. but juz listen.. since sm1 is advicing.. im sure u guys do that too rite?? soo yea... sometimes i tell moiself.. it all depends on u.. ur mind.. but when i really see such things happening.. it can realli be frightening at timess... haiz...

Yeah well.. refering to moiself right now.. truthfully, i was overjoyed 2 daes ago... simply up the sky.. n then it came all dashing now.. n still havent recovered from it.. but its getting better though.. Am trying to get it out.. n be that person i was 2 daes back.. guess i juz need some time... yeah.. n due to that.. as usual.. started thinking n thinking.. dwelling over all kinds of issues.. related.. unrelated.. i think its pretty natural.. when sum1 falls.. all the negative aspects seem soo clear in view.. totally forgetting the word optimism... haiz.. started thinking of people who arent really bothered.... past.. memoriess... bad timess.. seriously don miss anyone.. just cant understand y the tot exist.... pretty confusing though.. yup.. soo onli way out... controlling my mind.. getting the neg out... filling it in with those positive vibes and moving on!! u knoe wat.. i think i realli need to tok to moi mind.. i mean.. seriously.. all these are soo unneccesary.. y am i making a perfect like soo imperfect?? GODDD................... this is wat happens when i start thinking..... bad bad bad... okiee... now that song has come to moi mind.. just gonna enjoy it for now... crazy me!! Lets just hope for a better day tmr.. cheers..

Deepavalli Love

2008-10-29T02:11:00.000-07:00

Alrite... here are some shots taken during diwali day... when for visiting.. n still more to come... had a great time... personally feel that.. one of the best parts of diwali wud be the sweets.. pineapple tarts, suji, muruku, cakes and etc.. wudnt feel the festive occasion without these... simple love them.. well.. as i don kinda celebrate this occasion at home with moi family.. i get too.. with moi darling frenz... n ever since i started celebrating it.. hmm.. for the past 3 yrs now.. i simply enjoy this day... its juz like xmas.. haha.. soo love it.. thanks babes.. n yup.. love moi frenz for this once thing... for always bringing for moi those sweets i love.. knowing i wudnt be having them at hm.. hahaha.. love ya neela babes for that.. n yup.. thanks soo much vnod... haha..
sooo here it goesssss........

Stressed Filled With Sadness

2008-10-29T01:56:00.000-07:00

Kinda feeling extrodinarily stressed out today due to some dumb werk i was tasked to get done by tmr.. i mean.. cant they just do it themselves... okiee.. i knoe.. its moi job.. i gotta get it done.. but how the hell too.. when i seriously cant find the answer to it... nvm.. got another dae to get it completed.. juz gonna c wat can be done tmr.. for now.. i guess.. im just gonna call it a day... the amount of pressure and stress in the lil brain of mind is definately not gonna help me in any way... oh yess.. was pretty taken aback by sum news i heard last evening... kinda still affected.. but trying hard enuff to take it positively.. i mean.. its seriously hard.. realli hard.. but don wish to let those feelings ruin the happy moments for now... praying hard enuff i wud get used to it.... gonna be the first time such a thing wud be happening.. n frankly.. its freakin the hell out of me... soo yeah... god help me.. god help us... alrite... m practically losing moi mind now... having a stressed out mind filled with sadness, n this is what u get.... relaxation needed....... losing it.......

My dil goes mmmm....

2008-10-27T21:57:00.000-07:00

"My dil goes mmmm... My dil goes mmmm... My dil goes mmmm... My dil goes mmmm..."

A must say thanks to moi darling Neela for allowing us to watch the movie at her hm during the henna session there.. haha.. now im living with the song.. simply cant get it of moi head... cuz im sooo in love with it... mite not realli knoe the meaning though.. but read it once... knoe it.. feel it.. :)

Soo yeah.. have ya ever gottan that feeling deep inside... the feeling of peace.. that happiness.. the joy that u feel deep inside.. n when u think of it.. it just brings a smile... i kinda realise it... maybe its it.. maybe its not.. but i feel it... the warmth deep down.. the joy.. the way ur heart leaps... the way a smile just forms from the thoughts.. the happiness and the sentiment u feel deep down... definately something not just any one can experience whenever u want too... i guess u would feel it when u feel it.. That real joy.. always tot buying moi fav dress.. moi fav shoes.. bags and watever i have been longing for was happiness.. but guess that mite be happiness.. but definately not the joy im feeling right now.. all of a sudden.. this feeling.. kinda knew it was there... but it seems to be evolving deeper within me these daes... and i enjoy feeling it... a complete feel... a feeling of being the happiest women in this planet... a feeling of just wanting to smile laugh jump scream... all at one gooo... n still not get enuff of it.... seriously... maybe this is it... but whatever it is.. m enjoying the feel.. just wanna keep it there... :)

now i knoee... when my heart goes mmmm................... i feel it.. n i love it....

Irritating

2008-10-23T00:15:00.001-07:00

Wat can be really irritating would be.. arriving extra late for work due to a massive jam that just gets on the nerves of everyone. But definately being lucky enuff having no1 arriving before you do. Followed by having given a huge amount of task which totally blocks your mind off.. not being able to do anything due to the lack of understanding... carried on.. took up the challenge and found a way out of that hell... and finally when it was the time to relax and have some great enjoyable time with precious ones, an incident occurs. Wouldnt make it sound tat huge... its definately a matter not to even bother about.. but hey... it did cause a sense of irritation.. soo yeah.. irritation!! Seriously.. juz wanna let ya knoe.. this is moi blog.. n yes.. moi blog.. if ur moi fren or a'int.. or you just wanna glance thru it.. read it... write ur views.. go ahead.. but hey... i m onli asking for ya views.. again i stress ur views... not ur questions!! I've gottan enuff them on moi taxing mind to be answered... soo yeah.. n if u feel that moi entries has got aniting to do with ya... ur life.. be it.. it might.. or it might not.. again i stress.. its moi views! seriously... truly.. do not expect anyone coming back and questioning me.. i mean, from as far as im concern, no1 has ever questioned me.. n those whu did.. never lasted long in moi live... or list... sooo yeah... if u arent interested... u have more then enuff time to erase this link from ur PCs.... do not wish to hear such tings again... thanks .... :)

n yesss.... ending with an happy note.. found moi darling renu's link today!!!! love ya babee... :)

Heartbreaker

2008-10-22T01:01:00.000-07:00

Detest it each time the same sensation arises within. Seriously don't seem to understand how many are customary to such feelings. Pretty sure most out there go through or have gone through being heartbroken or being an heartbreaker.. either way, seriously find it wounding! A number go through the feeling of being heartbroken slightly more then those being the cause of the heartbreak. I definately have been in both situations and i have to stress the point that having to break sum1s heart is as terrible as having his/her own heart broken. Truly from my perception and experience, both are an awful feeling that an individual as to go through. Noone cant be blamed upon for falling in love... and noone can be blamed upon for breaking an heart. But i am sure that many are living with that guilt deep within them for the cause of an heartbreak, just as how many, take years to get over a person after an terrible breakup being the heartbroken. But seriously.. i terribly detest that one feeling most. I mean, we have no rights in our hands to upset some1 soo deep within.. why i previously questioned.. a'int it suppose to be one guy love one gal, or vice versa.. the one they knoe is for them? i mean.. if that was the way it was suppose to be.. then y are many getting hurt.. still go thru the pain n suffering.. Sometimes, i wonder.. is it just me.. or the way i communicate.. but then again i think.. i am clear in moi mind and heart with no ill intentions running through... but it cant be blamed on the other.. it happened, soo that he/she tot the one is here.. standing right beside them.. n the sentiment grows and evolves deeper within them without realising the fact that it might not be the one.... but god knoes the fact.. i am no1 to predict it.. we don knoe wat our future upholds for us, but i am sure we have a certain wants that we strive to make possible. Watz the worst part of such situations would be, only the good ones, the innocent hearted get the pain and hurt. I mean, i am sure you have to agree that it was never fair and would never be too.. but why? still yet to be answered... Sometimes due to the hurt that you cause to ppl, some tend to forget themselves, they tend to live in that hurt, that guilt and not open up.. never realising its okie.. and that has an effect on them to an extreme that it affects the ones they love... tried hard... trying hard.. but they never seem to get over it. Maybe once, it would have helped, but countless.. wudnt it hurt?? They are many out there who don't mind breaking those innocent hearts, but i tell ya.. i doo.. i seriously do.. and i am disgusted with those who are perfectly fine with it.. i mean, never should a game be played with the hearts and minds.. But i tell you.. if the one ur upsetting is some1 who deserves it.. the pinch wudnt be there.. but if its an innocent heart.. u wud feel it.. till the end...........

Ex Best Friend

2008-10-19T23:29:00.000-07:00

Cant help but feel disgusted and anger rise within.. n yup.. maybe hurt.. by the fact that such words were said.. didnt realise giving an advice for a persons own benefit would result in such ways. Upset.. best frenz once.. the closeness shared.. n the understanding.. n all of a sudden, it feels like it was an stranger all along.. maybe the closeness has bcum a past.. never felt it till this moment.. was advicing on the way to wrg doings of life an mistake? dont quite get how it can be? instead.. i hear comments from others about my way of life.. i mean.. im not saying im perfect moiself.. but if im adviced... i m sure being a fren.. i mean once close fren.. i wud listen.. and if im arent pleased with it.. i rather voice it out.. to the advisor itself.. but i guess this is juz moi way of thinking n fact of life.. but seriously.. i feel that if u have an issue with a particular some1.. what is soo difficult with toking it out with that person? Moreover.. she being ur fren... sometimes.. i juz dont understand why friends make things soo difficult.. i mean.. they say.. share everiting.. call ya besties and stuff.. but juz end up bitching abt out bhind ur back.. wat do u call these ppl?? i mean.. well.. i had been wanting to post an entry on friendship.. but this wudnt be it.. i've got lotsa more to get answered for that chap.. anyway.. i seriously just wanna say this.. sometimes ppl cant see the wrg they are doing.. soo this is where sum1 needs an advice.. but if u feel ur too perfect for that.. then too bad.. go ahead an ruin both ur life and the ppl ard ya.. seriously.. i wudnt give a shit if the person ur affectting izzint asking me for help.. but to bad.. i guess u've decided to ruined it all.... sooo all the best...

this is what i mean by.. there is no such thing as best frenz.. i've long given up on that word.....

Piece

2008-10-19T03:42:00.001-07:00

Our piece of joy...

Our piece of happiness..

Our piece of love hate...

In High Spirits

2008-10-16T23:21:00.000-07:00

Didnt intend to write todae.. but then.. tot.. n yeah.. decided.. that i had tooo... cuz m currently feeling extremly contented.. not for any big issues though.. haha.. well.. woke up todae feeling extremly fresh.. excited.. for no reason.. trust me.. thats when it started.. checked moi acct b4 reaching werk n there it was.. the first happiness of the dae.. haha.. richer with pay.. finally.. waited for it, god knoes how long.. finally its here.. its time for shopping.. but suddenly not sure watta shop for?? haha.. then cums the second best news.. moi sup allowing me to leave early from werk.. cuz the bigboss issnt ard... Wooohooo... happiness man... its like being in hell each dae here.. oohh.. maybe it has improved though.. its more of like being in purgutory now.. kinda seriously getting used to the life here.. can u believe it.. i havent digested that fact yet myself.. oh yea.. n the next big newss.. moi half dae leave got approved for the 24th.. now i can finally see moi bestie's POP.. here i cum samad.. haha.. looking forward to soo many things yet to cum.. excited.. anxious.. a mixture of all emotion..

N yea well.. later tonite meeting up with moi darlz.. kes n nishal.. gonna have dinner.. the man whus flying off.. for juz a mnth tmr wans briyani.. so we are kinda heading to tekka.. hope m allowed to glance thru sum suits.. depends on that gong!! n yea.. finally.. missing my binte darlz terribly.. seriously cant believe its been 2 whole damn long weeks since i saw her.. realli hope i don end up cin ya with lesser flesh.. she needs the meat.. realli.. missing her.. oh yess.. hate TP.. well.. i have nv said this b4.. but nw i do.. hate Tp... y?? imagine having ur best fren in the same course as you.. but nv once in this three years of skooling, they have brought us togther in the same class.. nvm abt that.. now imagine not even the same lec?? moi goodness.. seriously.. our timetables clashes like nobodys business.. its definately soo upsetting.. yeah but i guess we wud manage.. the skipping of lectures.. n classess.. no worries..

well yea... leavin from this hell now.. oopzz.. sorry.. purgutory... cheers ;)

loveconfusion

2008-10-16T01:02:00.000-07:00

well.. i have always tot.. maybe in moi typical or may i say conservative tinking that there is only one particular guy for a gal.. or vice versa.. wat i exactly mean would be.. there is only one guy out there for the gal.. soo more of like.. tatz her soulmate.. fated n stuff.. but... as time goess.. as life goess.. it seems different.. many are using the word love.. i cant argue if that love is sincere or afterall an infactuation. Sometimes it confuses me.. on the fact that how do people end up loving soo many people at a time?

That itself makes me doubt.. or wonder wat the real feeling of love should be?? i mean.. everione says.. i wud knoe it when it cums.. but i realise that many have the wrg perception of love.. what if they call it love.. but in real fact its not love at all..... i mean.. seeing from the other facts... the supporting points.. it dosent make out to be love.. therefore.. its rather confusing.. i mean.. i have to admit.. even i myself had been in such a situation before.. but i wouldnt agree nor disagree if the feeling i have for a particular person now is true love.. i mean.. no one actually tot us the feeling... n yup.. as many says.. u wud knoe if it cums.. but again i ask.. how do u knoe if tatz it?? n again... how is it that.. when some1 feels the same feeling more then once.. i m not refering to two timers.. but love once before.. n love another time.. soo which is love? both? Soo.. theres no such thing as... there is only one such person out there for you? cuz love comes more then once... its pretty perplexing.. hmm.. and what sud be done if there are ppl out there who tells a person they love them.. many more then one tells a particular party.. then.. how wud the party knoe which one of them is for him or her? which one is the true one.. the true love? im sure.. everyone wud say.. go for the one you love.. in all of them.. but think abt it... wat if the one u love izzint the wan for ya?? then something goes wrg rite?? it still puzzles meee.... well... as far as i am concern.. i guess... if u love some1.. n that person loves you.. n if u see ur future with him... n maybe some signs from god.. then juz hold on to him or her titely.. n make them be the one for ya.. the one meant to be.. but definatley by choosing the right one i guess.. i knoe i wanna spend the rest of my life with this particular person.. i donno if hes the one meant for me.. if hes the one god sent for me.. but i've decided to make that true... i knoe i can be realli contradicting sometimess.. sorry for tat.. juz writing my mind out.. cheers...

Disappointment

2008-10-13T00:44:00.000-07:00

i was just chatting with an old fren of mine... a guy whu's ex gal was moi bestie before.. ya well, i ended up chatting with him.. after soo mani months or can i say years.. n im seriously soo affected by the conversation. It was soo heartbreaking to hear n find out soo mani things abt a gal whu i considered my best fren once. Realli its terribly dissappointing.. :( When i knew her once, she was a leader.. a quite decent and innocent gal who thinks of the future with aims up soo high.. but now.. when i hear abt her.. its the total opposite.. smting which upsets me.. y is it that when many wanna achieve someting bigger in life n wanna be successful in life as they grow older, there are others who are just wanting to spoil it... make life sooo horrible for themselves and the ppl ard them?? Being an open minded gal moiself, i knoe that i have moi wrg doings too.. but i knoe moi limits.. i knoe how to save moi reputation.. i knoe how to behave.. but y is it that some gals juz cant... its soo upsetting.. i knoe i've done wrg.. but i think it is to a certain extend.. im not justifying moi wrg doings.. but seriously.. i feel that as a gal.. she sud always have a certain stand.. make ppl proud of ya.. make ppl tok abt her in an positive way... not in a way that brings her name down.. spoils her reputation.. its soo upsetting.. seriously.. especially.. when i knoe that it was some1 close to me that ended up like tat.. its damn upsetting.. y is it that these daes even gals cant stay with one man?? whats the big diff with going with diff types of men?? don they all have the same ting that u wan? i mean.. if its the heart that u wan.. then sudnt u be serious n stick to one? i knoe there are gals whu flirt.. juz moi smsing.. toking n yup.. thatz it.. even i do that smtimes.. i admit.. but it stops with jus SMS and toking.. tatz it.. no physical contact n stuff.. but there are gals out there who are practically slping with two diff guys each dae.. how disgusting can that be?? seriously.. if u can give moi a valid reason for that.. i can consider.. but slping with a guy?? n another.. issnt tat alil too much... imagine how the other party wud feel.. imagine being in that persons position.. wudnt tat suck.. it wud.. i always tot that it was guys doing such stuff now a daes.. but trust moi.. gals have turned out to be worst.. n its a big dissappointment.. realli...

The Begining..

2008-10-13T00:36:00.000-07:00

Hey..

Not sure why im using another blog acct when i've gotta another existing.. guess that acct is more for a particular set of eyes.. this can be for you guys.. yup.. m basically a person who thinks alot n love writing down wat i feel.. mite b of interest to ya.. or mite not.. but m definately some1 who questions the world tremendously... soo yeah.. if u can.. try answering moi questions.. state the fact.. n share with me ur opinions... wud realli love to know what the rest of the world thinks.. But i definately respect each individual has his or her own perception of life.. soo yeah.. enjoy reading....... cheers..